What to do?

[schooling]

I'm in a real quandry and would really appreciate some advice.

DS (3) appears to have some SN, not sure what but he refuses to intergrate with other children his age and just doesn't do what other kids seem to do (Doesn't appear to have a clue what age he is, doesn't care about sanctions, naughty step doesn't work at all)

DD (2) is amazing. Bilingual. Out of nappies. Loves classes, loves singing, dancing. etc.,

DS got rejected from prep school last year and I'm fearful that he will be rejected this year too
DD will absolutely certainly be accepted.

So, what do I do?

I don't want to send one child to a great school and not the other?
COnsider home ed?
Send them both to a different school?

Are you in the uk? Can you not send them both to a state school? Sounds awful to put ds through the process of "failing" at his age, and it sounds like dd would excel anywhere.

Yes, we are in the UK, but the school they would probably get allocated is over 7 miles away and (sorry) shit.

It has a horrible reputation. THat's why I'm looking at private school.

OK, it's probably nearer 4 miles away, but it's horrible and I don't want to send them there.

when you say he was rejected from prep school what do you mean? he was expelled? they just refused to offer him a place? at 3??

i would look for a better school if i were in your position, one that can cater for his needs. is he being assessed?

He was not offered a place

No assessment. He has been seen by I don't know how many people and they all say he's within the 'normal' range, but he seems very differnet to other kids his age:

1. No idea of age (only just grasped name)
2. No idea of consequences
3. No idea of presents / rewards
4. No idea of punishment

i dont think I would want to send my children to a school that rejected 3 years olds tbh. The things your son does/doesnt do sound much like my son (and daughter in fact) at three. They both went to a primary school and before that the nursery attached to the primary school that was considered to be a bad school and we LOVE it they thrive there. I have no idea why the school has the reputation it does tbh.

wow, i thought with private schools you basically could have a place as long as you were willing to pay.

i would look around. mention to schools that you think he may have some SN and find one that is sympathetic to that...

i would also go and talk to your health visitor, if he does have special needs then it would be really worth your while getting him assessed as soon as you can because there are often long waiting lists.

If you can, why not keep them both at home until DS is rising 5? Perhaps he'll be able for it then and you can make a better decision.

1. Get the 'some sort of SN investigated'. See your GP, tell her you're concerned and ask for a referral to a child development paed.

1. Most private schools don't accept kids with SN. So even if they did accept you later, or you found a different one, there's a high chance they'd just kick him out when he's older:(

1. Which means you probably have to send your DC to a state school (or HE him). If you have no choice at least it's an easy decision to make :)

1. Which leaves you with only 1 choice - should you send your DD to a different school from your DS? Can you? I mean logistically would it be possible?

It's a nightmare having kids at different schools. I would send both schools to the best state school you could get them into.

1. You can deregister them at any time and HE them if the state school doesn't work out. You can also keep them on the waiting list for other schools.