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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Overnight Trip Age 6

25 replies

TrippedUp · 26/05/2011 08:25

AIBU to think my DD is a little young for an overnight school trip aged 6? I´m not terribly happy about the prospect generally and am particular concerned about how the other children will respond to her bedwetting. She has a recognized medical problem which can not be treated until she is older.

Does anyone have any particular tips on how to manage bedwetting on a schooltrip?

Thanks!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

HappyMummyOfOne · 26/05/2011 09:14

Is there any chance you could collect DD just befoe bedtime and return her in the morning, less stress for you both or does your DD want to stay over?

Original poster

TrippedUp · 26/05/2011 09:20

That´s what we would both prefer but I´m not sure how the school would respond to this. It´s not terribly sympathetic towards things like this or supportive of any subsequent bullying either. Do you agree it would be a reasonable request?

OP posts:

MovingAndScared · 26/05/2011 09:28

hi - I would imagine there may well be other children who bedwet/are in pull up as well -she could put on a pull up when she gets into bed maybe - so the other children are less likely to notice - its not uncommon at 6 -but DS is 51/2 and still in them for instance has she stayed away from you at all - eg sleepover, at GP etc -
but 6 does seem quite young for an over night school trip

verybored · 26/05/2011 09:33

That would be too young for my 6 year olds, but my older DS would have been fine at this age. I think it depends on the children but I am quite surprised they are running this trip. Can you imagine trying to get a whole load of 6 year olds to sleep??!!

There will be a number of children who wet the bed as it's not at all uncommon at that age.

Original poster

TrippedUp · 26/05/2011 09:50

Hi and thanks for your responses!

I also thought she could put on pull ups after she gets in her sleeping bag but even with those the bed is sopping wet most days. So trying to keep it secret could make things worse than just coming clean to start with, don´t you think?

I´ve no idea why they run this trip, tradition in the school.. The children stay away longer and longer every year.

OP posts:

MovingAndScared · 26/05/2011 10:09

OK -that is quite a lot of wee - poor girl -
I think you need to have a chat with who ever is running the trip and see how they would deal with the bedwetting - and with homesickness which must happen - and maybe talk to the other parents about what they think -about the trip not the bedwetting - and what does your DD want to do -

Elibean · 26/05/2011 12:47

There is absolutely no way my (now 7 yr old) would have gone aged 6. Her sister probably would, aged 4. I wouldn't be happy about school insisting on 6 yr olds doing overnight trips, tbh.

I would talk to the person in charge of the trip, and explain the situation, and suggest picking her last thing at night and bringing her back - if they are not happy with that, they need to make a suggestion that both you and your dd are happy with: she has a medical condition, and you and she both have the right not to feel harrassed about a school trip!

Olympias · 26/05/2011 13:45

I feel it is far better for your DD not to go on a trip at all, then to go, have a bed wetting accident and be subjected to the subsequent teasing for God knows how long - I wouldn't count on the kids her age being tolerant and understanding in such matters.

cakesaregood · 26/05/2011 13:58

I hadn't even thought about it until my DC (also 6) had an accident the night after I'd filled in the form for his overnight trip. I've done loads of overnight trips pre-children and nearly every time there would be one child who was a 'regular' bed wetter who had an accident. I can still hear the cry now, "Why didn't they tell us on the med form???"

If staff are forewarned, it's a lot easier to be discrete - they can keep an eye out. Also they should give clear instructions to your DD so she knows who to find in the middle of the night.

I updated our form (no medical reasons here, just a 'normal' 6yo!) If the stats are right, there should be at least 3 wet beds in the morning , why should I feel bad that DS's will be one of them?

At least it will be someone else sorting it out in the middle of the night (until the washing comes home:-) ).

They are little, but mine hasn't batted an eyelid that this is an unusual thing to do. I'm holding back all my anxieties as much as I can and I'm sure they'll have a fab time.

Hulababy · 26/05/2011 14:11

Good teachers will help your daughter sort this out discretely if she has an accident. Just tell them in advance.

bitsyandbetty · 26/05/2011 17:50

I have not heard of 6 year olds in our going on overnight trips with school although some with beavers.

southofthethames · 26/05/2011 18:10

I agree with Olympias - it's hard for a teacher/assistant to guarantee they will spot bedwetting before the child's peers do. I think age 6 is too young to go on such a trip. I do sometimes worry that schools are spending more time and resources on extras - no matter how memorable/educational in non-academic ways - than on things that need to take priority like academics and personal support for pupils. Eg a young friend's experience at school of fun camps and field trips but whose school let her (and others) leave without adequate maths teaching so she now can't get a good job and is very ashamed of her poor qualifications, and is struggling to redo it by correspondence.

hockeyforjockeys · 26/05/2011 18:18

I haven't taken children this young away, but I have taken several groups of 9-11 year olds away. Every time we get at least one bed-wetting incident, and I have only had to deal with one case of teasing about it. If we are told by parents that their child is a bed-wetter then we make sure we put them in a room with children who we know won't tease them. When it does happen and their roommates notice we have a little chat about it with the group and explain how it must feel, and that it is not a result of them being a 'baby'. I've found the vast majority are very mature about it. However I know with 6 year olds it may not bbe so easy to get them to empathise!

Runoutofideas · 26/05/2011 18:30

I think it is too young. My 6 yr old still wears pull ups and is embarrassed about it. There's no way she would want to go.

Mum2be79 · 26/05/2011 21:10

If the trip is tradition, the obviously it has occurred in previous years without a hitch. Personally, 6 is rather young.

Our Y6 children go on a 3-day trip every year and every year there is a bed-wetter. You'll be surprised at how understanding kids can actually be and how discrete the teachers can make it.

MrsBrollyhook · 26/05/2011 21:43

Although I think it could be likely that other childrdn might wet the bed too, I think 6 is far to young for overnight trips. There must be loads of children who are homesick/upset or just ridiculously overexcited and won't sleep. Sounds like a nightmare for the staff.

I'm glad my DD's will be in Yr3 before they do overnight trips!

weblette · 26/05/2011 21:52

I took several 6yos on a one night Beaver sleepover the other week, I was pre warned about 2 children, both of whom wore pull-ups, it really wasn't an issue - the others had absolutely no idea.

ImNotaCelebrity · 26/05/2011 23:15

DS had 2 nights away at the age of 6 (music course, not school) and was absolutely fine. I don't think the age is an issue at all, depending on the individual child. It certainly isn't something that should be forced on them if they're not comfortable. Equally, if she's keen to go, a medical condition shouldn't prevent her participating, and everything possible should be done to make her feel it won't be a problem.
Agree with previous posts that good teachers will be sympathetic and able to deal discretely with it.
Like Mum2be79, have also run school trips for 9 - 11 year olds where we have had bed wetters, children taking medication to prevent bed wetting, and children wearing pull-ups.
Don't think it is at all unusual for 6 year olds to have accidents.

manicinsomniac · 27/05/2011 01:25

Wow, I wouldn't want to take 6 year olds.

Our youngest residential is for Year 4 and, while I haven't encountered it often, we;ve had the odd wet bed. I don't think the children even knew though, the child got up as normal, made the bed then came and quietly told us what had happened. It wasn't a problem at all.

lljkk · 27/05/2011 04:40

OP, where does she go to school that they insist on overnight trips?

MumBe · 27/05/2011 08:08

Could you go as a helper so you are near her on the trip. I wouldnt send 6 yr old they are too young.

Sylvaniasandwich · 27/05/2011 16:04

Glad to see other people think 6 is too young. I don't really get the whole overnight trips thing. I went on three school trips in primary school and remember them all being quite miserable experience thanks to lack of teacher control, bullying by other pupils and one very strange experience with some pervert. At dd's school there is one shortish trip for Y6. That seems reasonable.

sunnyday123 · 27/05/2011 19:25

wow, 6 too young for me i wouldnt let her go because of age more than bedwetting - you cant be the only worried parent, ask around if others are not going.

teacherwith2kids · 27/05/2011 22:22

DS was a chronic bedwetter, even now at 10 I would describe him as an occasional wetter.

He has been away from home with Cubs 5 times over night, usually for 2 nights, and is about to go on the 6th trip.

He has wet the bed (sleeping bag) EVERY time, until recently both nights. He takes a waterproof sleeping bag liner (for night 1) and a spare sleeping bag (for night 2). He wets too heavily for pull-ups to be effective.

He has NEVER been teased. I have always warned the leaders beforehand, they help him deal with it discreetly, no other child seems ever to have noticed and certainly the other boys (many of whom are also at school with him) have never said a word about it.

I have always worried about it, but as long as he and the leaders are relaxed and happy, I have no problem. He managed a 1 night stay away without wetting earlier in the year so I have some optimism that this may only be a slightly damp camp not a sopping wet one!

lljkk · 28/05/2011 09:27

How do they not notice? DS (almost 7) is still wet at night, and it honks if he isn't in a disposable pull-up that fully contains all the wee.

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