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ThThinking to withdraw my son from nursery

9 replies

Mumchatting · 13/02/2018 16:15

Hello. I am thinking whether I should take my son out of his nursery. He has been attending school nursery 5 afternoons a week since September. To be honest he doesn't like it so much there. He doesn't cry there but every morning when we dress and prepare to go to nursery he tells me that he doesn't want to go. When we are there he asks me 'mummy please stay here with me' (It's breaking my heart when I leave).
I have to persuade him and promise treats like for instance bringing a little chocolate when I pick him up. He won't stay there otherwise.

He has been catching all viruses and colds on top of that ever since he started nursery. He is well and healthy for 2-3 weeks then he catches a virus (or ear infection, cough, cold, conjunctivitis and so on) that last 2-4 weeks. He also caught a flu 3 weeks ago and has been really unwell and on antibiotics at the moment due to ear infections and bad cough.
I'm seriously thinking to stop nursery and just keep him at home with me until September when he starts Reception. I really wish he liked the nursery more and would benefit from social aspect of it but I can see he isn't really keen on nursery. Plus the constant viruses...
Should I just keep him away from nursery or carry on. I can provide him lots of socialisation with other kids when we meet friends and do playgroups. So I hope he won't miss the social spect that much.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Adviceplease360 · 13/02/2018 16:17

Keep him at home.
His immune system won't get stronger by getting unwell so regularly contrary to what people will soon say and there is just no point in upsetting him.

RavenWings · 13/02/2018 16:20

Well, I really feel for your son but that doesn't sound too unusual. Catching all the bugs going is very normal.

As for him not wanting to go, I (when I briefly worked with that age group) remember kiddies being very sad about their parents leaving - until the parent left and they were perfectly fine then, happy out. That also wouldn't strike me as being unusual. What do the staff say about his behaviour and emotions during the day?

It's really up to you and what you feel comfortable doing.

Isittimeforbed · 13/02/2018 16:23

Does he enjoy it once you've left him? My DD does 2.5 days at childcare. She's very happy being left in the morning on the 2 full days, but always cries when I leave her on the day she just does the afternoon. No idea why and she always settles down once I've left.

gillybeanz · 13/02/2018 16:23

Aw, I'd keep him home too, he wants his mummy, not a bunch of strangers.
Some ids don't like nurseries and some parents don't either.
you are right to consider the social aspects, make sure he has a chance to mix with other children, like cousins? take a few numbers of parents before you leave the nursery then you can arrange playdates.
None of our 3 dc went and they all started school and settled well.

Mumchatting · 13/02/2018 17:05

Apparently he is fine when I leave him at the nursery and they aren't concerned about anything. It's just my own feeling tells me that he isn't really enjoying time there since he always refuses to go there. Also he doesn't play with kids there but on his own. But when we meet friends with kids that he knows he plays with them.
Also his behaviour changed a bit since September he started nursery. He is scared of sleeping alone in his room, he is scared to stay in the toilet alone, he cries when I go to feed his sister (I breastfeed), he screams when I have to stop playing with him in order change his sister nappy... The list is getting longer and longer. I hope it's just the age (3.9 years old) and it's just a phase and I hope that it's not related to the nursery. He has been acting strangly lately, mainly jealous of his sister but he has never done it before , not even when she was tiny baby, only recently after she started to walk and grab his toys...

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Mumchatting · 13/02/2018 17:11

Sorry I pressed to soon and just wanted to add that basically what I'm trying to say is that he has been a really good boy and we never had any issues with him. He wasn't jealous of his sister but only since the nursery started he has been suddenly scared of everything and I'm a bit worried.

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PineappleScrunchie · 13/02/2018 17:16

Trust your me intuition on whether nursery is benefitting him.

But, it’s normal for kids to only become jealous of their siblings when they start to get mobile and interested in toys, regardless of nursery.

HSMMaCM · 13/02/2018 17:29

Keep him home. He doesn't have to go.

Mumchatting · 13/02/2018 21:49

Yes, I think I will keep him with me at home, he doesn't have to go there. At least hopefully he won't catch a bug every 2-3 weeks! He can have lots of fun going to parks and playgroups with mummy and his little sister (of course once he gets better).
Thanks for commenting.

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