School psychologist referral age 3?

[astarish]

Anyone had a child referred to the school psychologist? My son turns 4 next month and has been at his nursery since his 3rd birthday.

His behaviour when he started wasn't great but I figured this was due to a new environment (He was with a childminder previously and very well behaved). His behaviour was up and down over the year but got much worse towards the end of the school year. A few incidents with other children, purposely wetting himself, not listening, naughty behaviour. Nothing I was too concerned about, we tried a few techniques to get on top of his behaviour.

A friend and her son have been staying with us for the last 2 months and his behaviour has gotten very bad. He returned to school and within 4 days of being back, his teacher called me in for a meeting. He had been told he couldn't play with the toys and got very angry, threw a wooden spoon across the class. She was concerned about his reaction and said she will be referring him to the school psychologist.

Just wondered if anyone has experience of this? I've been so upset since..

The few things you've mentioned would certainly not merit a referral to the educational psychologist. Is there more to his behaviour than you've said in your message? Educational psychologist appointments are like gold dust, and extremely expensive for schools. They don't make referrals lightly.

@Littlefish sorry didn't want to post something too long..

The incident with the spoon is when they asked me to come in for a meeting, their concerns were with how angry he got, he often doesn't listen to instructions, he's happy when he plays alone but if another child takes his toy he will kick off.. which I thought was normal behaviour? He hit his teacher in the face once last year which he hasn't done since. He doesn't like being told no, he's like this at home also. He has a reward system in place, time outs.. if I put him in time out, he will scream/cry non stop.

They asked that I get a GP referral but they have told me they won't until they get a letter from the school. GP said he looks fine, but my son just happened to be behaving at that point.

I agree with littlefish that EP appts are never the first port of call. You have to have met all sorts of criteria to get a referral here.
I think you need to meet with staff again - SENCo ? B.Co ? Whoever is referring to EP, and get to the bottom of what all their concerns are. Tel them you really want to understand what the issues all are, and you'd also like to know what they have been putting in place so far.
They should have drawn up plans with you to look at strategies they were going to try months before it gets to EP referral stage.

Agree with other posters. However, I think you need to look at this from a different angle. It is possible that your child might need extra support and help, and the earlier that an individualised plan and intervention is put in place the better. It will mean your child is getting the right understanding and support he needs.
It is hard to hear when our child is deemed a little different but if you work with the professionals his needs may be met fully. Hard to handle at this point but it might be a positive thing!

Agree Senorita