20 weeks encephalocele.

[corinned]

Corinne D(45)

17/01/2025 at 8:53 am

Hello, we found out at my 17 week scan my baby has ventriculomegaly with high posterior encephalocele. We got recommended termination, so we got a second opinion yesterday and they confirmed the diagnosis and recommended termination again. So me and my partner have decided to go for the surgical termination, we're heartbroken too say the least.. has anyone else been through this? I'll be 20 weeks when it happens (next Friday). I'm so anxious & scared. Too make matters worse my baby is on the move all the time, so it's just hurts. I'm feeling guilty beyond belief. Thank you. X

OP this sounds heartbreaking. I'm sorry you're going through this. Have you searched TFMR (termination for medical reasons) support? There are lots of organisations offering support for people in this situation. All the best.

Hi OP, I'm so sorry you're going through this. I had to terminate a pregnancy for medical reasons in 2023 and its the hardest thing I ever had to do. I had a compassionate induction of labour rather than the D&C but I'd be happy to talk you through what happened privately if you want.

In terms of support, TFMR mamas on Facebook are brilliant - everyone in the same boat.

SANDS have more general baby loss support, not all TFMR related.

Abigail's footsteps offers funding for counselling - we were offered 6 hours free that both DH and I could use.

Aching arms provide teddy bears to bereaved parents, donated by other parents. The bear gave me something to hold when I couldn't hold my son.

Finally, I won't tell you not to feel guilty, that won't help, but you are doing what you can to prevent your baby from a lifetime of pain and suffering. Babies lost this way never know pain, they only ever know love and comfort being with you. I know how those kicks are heartbreaking but you are protecting your baby.

Sending love ❤️