Feel rubbish from the home visit

[Hebecoops02]

Had a visit from my midwife and the health visitor. They have made me feel like I’m going to be a bad mum because they said it’s unsatisfactory.

What is unsatisfactory, exactly?

Yes, what did they say was unsatisfactory?

I don't think that anyone can advise you without some detail. Is there any that you can do to improve the situation?

Some of the mess

Well that easily solved by clearing up. Then you won't need to worry about anything.

Tidy it up then it won't be unsatisfactory.

As a pp said, that's easily fixed before your baby arrives, surely?

As a social worker who has dealt with many unsatisfactory houses there is a big difference between a bit messy but easily fixable and totally unhygienic and unfit for human habitation. Where in the scale is your house?

What do you think of it op?

Are you able to sort it and tidy up?

OP are you getting any professional support?

I'm going to guess that this goes well beyond what any of us (mostly) laypeople can help with over the internet.

The fact that you had a joint visit suggests that there might be some concerns already?

Do you want to talk about what’s going on?

Why didn’t you tidy up before they came? Is it due to pregnancy sickness or because there is so much of it you’ve gone blind to it?

As a HV I just want to reassure other mums that a bit of clutter, some dishes in the sink, laundry piles etc. are considered par for the course. You don’t need to tidy up specifically for home visits. Families often choose pregnancy to start renovations so we’re well used to dust etc. too.

To ring alarm bells a house would have to be genuinely unsafe (think hoarding, faeces etc.) and usually there are other issues going on.