Am I the father?

[Stevensaw]

Hi. I see a lot of people helping on this and wanted to reach out to see if anyone could help me.
so basically a woman I have been seeing has let me know she is pregnant and it is my child. She went for an ultrasound today and was dated 6 weeks 3 days but the first time I slept with her 5 weeks and 3 days ago. Also to add I only ejaculated in her on the 7th of November, I remember as we was away for the night and it just happened? I questioned her on this and she has said that that’s how pregnancy is dated. I know she slept with someone else about 7 and half weeks ago as she let me know but said she had a period in between and hasn’t slept with someone else since. Wouldn’t it make more sense for it to be the other man’s child as she is 6 weeks 3 days today?

Yes the dates sound right as you normally take two weeks off

Yes the dates sound right.

But as you were not exclusive, it is still possible that she saw someone around the same time than you.

When you say "many miscarriages" what do you mean?

How many and at what stage?

She has been my friend for a while but we kinda just got into a thing lately. She has had
3 miscarriages with her ex. Not sure at what stages

@Stevensaw, since you are up for learning things, there is no such word as 'brang'.

And also, use a bloody condom when you have sex.

@Stevensaw , I hope you and your friend can work things out with this pregnancy

Jesus people on here can be brutal, good luck @Stevensaw

Yeah it seems to be people are really upset about my choices. We all have made choices and had to deal with the consequences. Like iv said im happy about being a father just wanted some reassurance on how it was dated

Honestly dates do work but why would you trust someone you've known for a month and a half. You can get prenatal paternity tests. Non-invasive, just a blood test on the mum so no risk to baby.

Either way, I hope it works out for you both. It might not have been the start you both had in mind but can still go well :)

Thank you for the kind message

Because if you read the OP’s posts, you’ll see he has known her for much longer than 1.5 month and she is a friend first.

There is really no need to be snarky.

@Stevensaw I hope it will all work out well for all 3 of you.

The dates sound exactly right to be yours.

Why didn't you just google "how are pregnancy and conception dates calculated"?

There are endless articles all about this on the internet.

This

Regardless of dates and potentials, get a paternity test. Better that all of you know asap. I was over 30 when I found out my dad may not be my dad and I handled it well (if I do say so myself) but years later I'm still dumbstruck that everyone lied to me for so long. Think about the wee baby at the end of all this.

Hope everything works out

My advice?? Wear a condom if you don't wish to get anyone pregnant HTH

Brang? Are you 15?

@Stevensaw good luck with it all, this could end up being the best thing to happen to both of you.

I too fell pregnant less than 2 months into a new relationship (we'd been friends for longer). It was a massive shock but our daughter is now 4.5 years old, we're married and expecting our second child in a few months time. I wouldn't change any of it for the world.

Hi I did google information but I was struggling to understand the scan dates as it says pregnancy is dated from last period but I was unaware scans also did the same thing. I thought they produced how old the baby was from conception

Hi yeah we have been friends for about 4 years before anything

Conception is really an interesting subject and there are lots of things we don't innately know and many people wouldn't bother telling a man, and let's face it most don't bother to find out for themselves.

@Stevensaw did you know sperm can live inside a women for up to a week so even if she's on the pill, if you ejaculate in her and then she develops a sickness bug / norovirus that week she can still get pregnant from the sex you've already had if she can't keep the pill down. There is no 'safe' time of the month yo have sex without protection, she may well not be fertile when you have sex but a few days later she may well be.

If you insist on having sex without a condom it's worth learning the ins and outs of conception and also STI testing. You'll be wanting to get that done now too presumably as you are a mature grown up who is a father-to-be

It wasn't being snarky. If he trusted her he wouldn't be posting this here. 'Friends' isn't that descriptive. Everyone has different levels of Friends, it doesn't mean he knows her that well.

The dates match. But if he's going to be doubtful it would affect his relationship with his child. Only way to be sure is DNA test. End of the day she could have been sleeping with someone else too. He needs to decide whether he trusts she wasn't - but if he did why is he posting here?

It’s not that I don’t trust her it’s just that like iv said I didn’t understand how scans dated pregnancy. Thanks to some woman here I now understand

Why don't you just scroll on past and not bother commenting on MN? So unkind.

There's no harm in BEING KIND.