When to tell parents?

[bertiebelle]

Just found out i'm pregnant (planned!) However, My parents and in-laws are coming to our for dinner on Saturday! i don't know how to get out of drinking. I feel it's to early to them! I am 11 dpo and found out yesterday! They know I never so no to wine! And we are celebrating a house move so my MIL had bought champagne for us to have!
My friends told me as soon as she found out because she wanted support just incase anything happened.

Can you pop the champagne in kitchen then use lookalike shloer or similar? Or just day you're on antibiotics .

Depends how close you are in my opinion! I told mine within an hour of finding out on the test at around 5 weeks pregnant becasue we’re really close and I’d need them if the worst happened. You could always do the ‘I’m on antibiotics’ for the no drinking if you’re not ready yet 😊

I waited until six weeks to tell my parents in case it was a chemical, no one else until into the second trimester. The antibiotics excuse works great :-)

We were on holiday when I found out I was pregnant with my second child. We went out to dinner and I ordered a coke. My MIL said straight away, are you pregnant, so I couldn’t lie. We were also on holiday with my in laws when I found out I was pregnant with my first, so we told them straight away. I didn’t tell my work colleagues until I reached 12 weeks.

Can you say you've got a funny tummy?

Alternatively when I was hiding mine over Christmas I bought some non-alcoholic wine and topped up my glass with it in the kitchen before bringing it to the table. As I was hosting it was easier to act like I had my glass in the kitchen with me while I was preparing the food. Could you try that?

With the champagne can you or your DP pour it in the kitchen away from everyone?

If I'm really honest, if you normally drink bit don't that night they are definitely going to think/say to each other - bet she is pregnant- regardless of the reason you give.

The only way you might get away with it is if they think you ARE drinking

If you can trust them not to say anything to anyone else/ be supportive if it goes wrong, I'd just tell them.

We waited until I had my 12 week scan, but for full disclosure, we’d had losses before and that played a huge part in our decision. It also meant we had little scan pictures of our twins to show them then too, so that was nice.

My mum is my bestie and i love to MIL to bits! (Im so lucky) Its just that I will be 13 DPO when they come haha! so so early! think i will just have to tell them! My husband is away with work until friday and i haven't told anyone and i'm bursting to tell my bestie. but i want my husband to be first to know!

Totally depends on the relationship you have. I have told my parents straight away every time, the day of or after I took the test. I would immediately go to my mum if anything went wrong and don't see any need to hide it from them for days, let alone weeks. I also loved sharing the news with them, and needed support as I was so sick anyway!

But if you wouldn't want that support from them, or for any other reason relevant to you and your relationship, wait.

Cross post - definitely tell them, it will be such a special moment.

I hid it over Christmas by accepting wine but my mum and o kept interchanging glasses. That or antibiotics urine infection

If you haven’t told your husband, you can’t tell them. He has to be the first to know.

as for telling others, it all comes down to if they will be good support if things don’t go well. Women shouldn’t have to hide their pain and having a good support system is invaluable.

are you sharing that you are ttc? I chose not to drink except during my period once I was ttc just as a precaution. Other women take the slightly less conservative approach and just don’t drink during the 2ww.

Just don't drink and hopefully they're not rude enough to call you out on it. Even if they suspect you are pregnant it's pretty bad of them to ask, my in-laws suspected but didn't say anything because it's my news to tell and I decide when

Congratulations! Do not feel pressured to say anything - it's too early. I would take small sips and leave the rest in the glass or get your husband to neck some! A few sips will be fine.

You can also say you're hungover from the night before and not feeling up to it

i think feeling hungover is the only one they'd believe!

Have a glass poured for you, do cheers etc and don’t drink it

I think antibiotics are the best bet. Or having non alcoholic champagne. It’s so so early that you shouldn’t feel pressured to say anything, unless you feel they’d be really understanding of the fact it’s still early and can go either way

Antibiotics is basically waving a massive banner saying "I'm pregnant" and pretending you're not even though you know they know really and asking them to play along.

I'd just tell them. Or if not accept they will probably guess anyway and then it's a bit awkward.