Dear Father Christmas,as I'm pregnant.......

[ladymalfoy]

Could I have a proper wee? You know what I mean and if you don't ask your wife.
And cream that stops the itching. And one that stops the stretch marks. Or even one that does both.
And a gadget that will paint my toe nails and shave my legs.
Love Ladymalfoy.
Xxx

Also with rowboat. I would love the baby to have arrived before Christmas Day. DD1 is two and convinced Santa is going to bring her sister...beats the stork.

Dear Santa, I would like two things for Christmas please. I have been exceptionally good this year and think I deserve them.

first of all I would like my baby to be born. It's due on the 19th Dec, so if it could come no later than the 22nd that would be brilliant.

Secondly, I would like to be able to sleep on my tummy again. It was the only way I slept for 23 years of my life before getting pregnant. Sleeping on my side is horrible. I get numb arms and painful hips and it is just rubbish.

I shall leave you a whole box of mince pies to scoff and Rudolph can have as many carrots as a reindeer can eat if you would just please grant my wishes.