Charity calender - how would you feel about this?

[Kopparbergkate]

There's one of those "tasteful naked" calenders being organised by a group I belong to (trying madly not to out myself!) which I'm happy to take part in. At 37 I'm the youngest participant by about 5 years, ranging up to the oldest at probably mid-50s. The shoot will be in January. I hadn't gone public on my pregnancy yet but once the shoot date was confirmed, I emailed to let the organiser know that I'm pregnant and will be 31 weeks by the shoot date, in case that changed what she had in mind.

I've just received an email from her saying she didn't think it was appropriate to have an obviously pregnant woman on the calender but that we could probably find a way to disguise it. I'm a bit stunned tbh. Putting aside the fact that these naked charity calenders have been done to death (IMHO) and that doing the shoot in January is a little weird for a calender, do you find it odd that the bump would have to be "disguised"? I'm wondering if I'm the one out of step here - I mean Demi Moore looked great but maybe most people had an issue with that photo... (not that I'm suggesting I look like her but then neither do any of the others :))

What a strange comment? And what a horrible thing to say! Oh course it's appropriate to have an "obviously pregnant" woman on the calendar - if they're including a range of ages of women, then why not include a pregnant woman?

I would just turn up in January and refuse to be disguised. Just move smash the plant pot.

Beyond the original one (which was admittedly a novelty) who buys these naked calendars?! Surely people only buy them because the money is for charity, not because they want twelve pictures of random naked ladies?!

I find her comment really odd though. Maybe she's planning some kind of s&m calendar - the only reason why I can think she may think having a pregnant lady may be in appropriate!

It might be an age thing, my mum is really weird about pregnant bodies being on show and she's not even prudish or old fashioned. She just doesn't 'approve' of pregnant women in tight or skimpy clothing.

In your situation I would go along with it and then refuse to have my bump hidden or disguised on the day just to teach them a lesson!

If they hide your bump, FFS there'll be nothing left of you to see!

Really offensive- and frankly quite odd. What is more beautiful and feminine than a pregnant woman?

I think I'd be more concerned about why they are making a calendar in January, that would have alarm bells ringing for me

But agree with everyone else, it would be me and bump, or no me!

of course its not disgusting, but if they're very keen to make it tasteful and not too sexy, pregnancy is one of the most common fetishes ... so maybe its the OPPOSITE of thinking a nude pregnant woman is not pleasant to look at, and actually worrying that it might be a bit too pleasant for some???

My DM said people think it's crass and classless wearing a bikini when you were obviously pregnant

I said I think that says more about the people than the pregnant lady.

Shortly after she bought me two bikini tops in the sale.

I think older women can be funny about it. Until you confront them with it.

For the record I might buy one with lots of lovely bumps, but wouldn't with lots of naked oldies....

Actually if I could get 12 women and take a picture of them with babies each year starting with bump pix now, I think it would be a fab calendar....

That comment about it being 'inappropriate' to have a pregnant woman on it would get my back right up and make me thoroughly determined to do it! I would have a chat with the photographer, if I were you, not the organiser. The photographer will probably be very happy to do you a nice picture but would appreciate the info in case it changes what they want to do with lighting and so on.

I do agree that it's weird to have the shoot in January, but it may be that the photographer doesn't have much work on then (especially if their bread-and-butter is weddings!) and you're getting a reduced rate or something.

Thanks all, at least I know I'm not being completely weird not wanting the bump disguised! I think the issue is probably what a couple of people have said - she's "older" and our village is like the 1950s at the best of times - she's probably just got the "hide the bump, hide the bump" mentality than brought us maternity tents with peter pan collars :)

I think I need to sit down between now and the next meeting and decide how much I care.... my initial reaction was to insist on being included with my bump in all its glory to make a point; but I'm not going to change her attitude and i need to decide how much I'm prepared to beat my head against a brick wall to make a point.

Why on earth is the shoot in january? I think that's the weirdest thing.