PREPARING FOR DISAPPOINTMENT!@#$%^&*

[COLETTE1210]

I HAVE EXPERIENCED 3 MISCARRIAGES AND A FETUS WITH NO HEARTBEAT WHEN I WAS 3/12 MONTHS PREGNANT. LAST NIGHT I TOOK A PREGNANCY TEST AND IT CAME UP POSITIVE. I WAS EXCITED, NERVOUS, HAPPY, SCARED THEN PETRIFIED ALL AT ONCE. I CAN?T GET MY HOPES UP AND I CAN NOT GET EXCITED JUST YET. MY PAST PUT A DAMPER ON WHICH SUPPOSED TO BE THE MOST WONDERFUL NEWS. MY HUSBAND ALREADY IS PREPARING HIMSELF FOR DISAPPOINTMENT WHICH DOESN?T HELP ME TO STOP THE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS THAT RACE AROUND MY HEAD. I DON?T THINK I COULD HANDLE ANOTHER DISAPPOINTMENT. THE LAST COUPLE OF PREGNANCIES WEREN?T ENJOYABLE ONES. EVERY DAY I WOULD WAKE UP PARANOID THAT SOMETHING BAD WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO THE CHILD I WAS BARING. IT IS NOT HEALTHY FOR ME OR MY BABY TO PUT SUCH A STRAIN ON MY BODY AND MIND.
DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY POSITIVE ADVICE? HAS ANYONE GONE THROUGH THIS SAGA?

WELL, WENT TO THE DOCTOR TODAY. THEY TOOK MORE BLOOD TO MAKE SURE MY LEVELS ARE GOING UP. I WILL FIND OUT TOMORROW THE RESULTS. I AM SURE THAT THEY WILL BE FINE (GOD WILLING) CONSIDERING I HAVEN?T HAD ANY PROBLEMS SO FAR. THE DOCTOR STARTED ME ON THE PROGESTERONE WHICH HAS TO BE TAKEN EVERY DAY AND A ST. JOSEPH?S BABY ASPIRIN FOR NOW JUST IN CASE OF BLOOD CLOTS. I WILL NOT FIND OUT FOR ANOTHER COUPLE OF DAYS IF I WILL HAVE TO GO ON THE HEPARIN SHOTS BECAUSE I AM STILL WAITING FOR THE BLOOD TEST TO COME BACK ON THE FACTOR 5. THE BLOOD CLOT FACTOR 5 IS IN MY FAMILY TO BEGIN WITH BUT WHEN I WAS TEST A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO IT CAME BACK NEGATIVE. SO, WELL SEE. THE PROGESTERONE INSERTS I DON?T MIND AT ALL BUT THE HEPARIN SHOTS ARE A LITTLE SCARY. I WOULD HAVE TO GIVE MYSELF THE SHOT IN MY STOMACH EVERY DAY. EEEEEKKKKKKKKK. I WILL DO ANYTHING TO KEEP THIS BABY. NOTHING IS 100% EFFECTIVE SO OF COURSE THE WORRIES STILL SCRAMBLE IN MY HEAD BUT I AM GETTING BETTER CARE NOW THEN I HAVE IN MY LAST PREGNANCIES.

collette fingers crossed for you

Colette - keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you! You sound more positive today

colette1210, a friend of mine had heparin throughout her pregnancy (following 3 miscarriages) and now has a gorgeous 1 yr old baby girl. she has antiphospholipid syndrome, which she'd been tested for in the past but as it's intermittent it didn't show up then. I hope all goes well for you, x

santafio--thanks hun fingers and toes
baublebundle** x0x0
hey jenie. i do feel little more positive today. ;O in two hours i find out the results of my hcg levels if they are raising (god willing) so of course pins and needles to then. my sister made an excellent observation to me. my sister a mother of two basically broke it down to me saying yes, of course i am worrying now and the worrying never stops. first, i will mostly be worrying about losing this pregnancy but that is a horse of a different color. (if I take a step ahead) throughout the pregnancy i will be worrying and praying for a healthy baby. when the baby is born you worry about every little thing if the baby sneezed is he getting sick ect. ect. when a toddler, worries when they fall did they get hurt ect ect. when they go to school worrying, high school worrying worrying and more worrying, and its true. my brothers and sisters are all out of our parents? house and married and my mother still worries about each and every one of us. if my mother knows i am going out with my husband and friends she'll call my cell phone at least once to see were i am. i am the youngest but she does it to my sister who in 35 years old. lol. so basically this is the beginning of a life long stretch of worrying. i have also come to the conclusion that GOD will never put anything on my plate that i can't handle.