Denies having a dirty diaper and gets major meltdowns

[Emm2002]

Hello,

I have a 3.5-year-old boy who still uses diapers. Every time he poops, he refuses to have his diaper changed and insists on keeping it on. He never tells me when he has pooped, nor does he admit it when I ask him. Instead, he tries his best to conceal the fact that he has pooped so I won't notice. He doesn't seem to mind having poop in his diaper at all and continues playing as if nothing has happened. He appears entirely unaffected by it and has never had diaper rashes so far. However, when I attempt to change him, he becomes extremely angry, screaming, hitting, and kicking. Handling these outbursts alone as a single parent feels utterly hopeless. He genuinely detests diaper changes.

Does anyone have any advice on what I should do? I feel like I can no longer handle arguing with him.

Potty training is something I plan to attempt in the summer; right now, he's not interested in it.

Hi how are his communication skills? Can you ask him why he doesn’t like having his nappy changed?
donyiu see a pattern with when he poos if so can you make nappy changing part of a specific routing eg after lunch? Maybe it won’t seem as disruptive.

Potty train him now. Sounds like he is aware and embarrassed about wearing and using a nappy, which is why you are seeing so many tantrums. Hiding and avoiding nappy changes was one of the signs my ds was ready to potty train.

He might not like the idea of a potty right now (change is scary after all), but he will get used to it and be happier in the long run.

I have tried talking to him several times; often, he says he doesn't want to change, he doesn't have time, and he wants to keep it on. I don't understand it, I think it would be nicer to have a clean diaper on. He would quite happily sit in his dirty diaper all day if I let him, doesn't bother him whatsoever!

I tried potty training him some time ago, but it didn't work at all. So, I plan to wait until at least this summer.