Hi all, I'm new to Mumsnet but been a mum now for almost five years, had first DS 2018 then second in 2021.
Our first DS is autistic, with hearing aids (both ears), sensory issues, issues with climbing/jumping etc (v clumsy), v limited speech and language (not non verbal as he says single words and will sing under his breath).
Anyway we have been following a potty/toilet training programme with him since he's been 3.5 years and now he is almost 5 (in 2 months time) and no matter all the tactics, steps, visual aids, toys, words, etc etc he still does not go to the toilet himself unaided, will never do a poo in the toilet or potty and cannot or will not indicate when he needs. He is also scared of doing a poo, has had impaction a few times so is now on laxido which makes the poos v runny.
We did pants only for about 6 months but it was far too stressful and difficult for the nursery with the constant accidents. So now we are back in pull ups.
I feel like a total failure. He should be going to school this August but we have deferred him for a year as he's just not ready (we are in Scotland). School due to start soon and all his nursery friends are going. I feel sad about this but I just couldn't send him like this. Especially with no speech either.
Does anyone have any tips? We have used eric.org.uk website and it's been good and spoke to someone as well about the holding in, constipation, impaction and the effect of the laxido on poo training but it just feels never ending.