5 year old soiling & weeing himself HELP please

[Lgibson]

Hi totally new to this & this is my first ever post .. basically I have a 5 year old in January and he recently started school in September. But I’m literally at my whits end and a super stressed mum. He’s always suffered with comspiption since birth but he keeps pooing his pants sometimesjust little marks but other times bits of poo and it’s becoming a weekly thing to the point sometimes I’m just binning his pants. I aka him why he’s doing it and he says he doesn’t know he’s doing it I don’t know how to encourage he starts going to the toilet even if he thinks he just wants to trump. It’s getting out of hand but he’s also started weeing himself again a couple of times in day and constantly on a night. He was dry at night for almost a year on a night then boom out of nowhere this has started. I feel so stressed and don’t know what to do as he’s obviously at school now and I don’t want other children picking up on it and bullying him for it. Can anyone give me any advice as I’m literally heart broken for him. I’ve tried rewarding him with sticker charts, Praisng him. taking toys away even telling him of but nothing works and i’m generally starting to worry something may be wrong with him. I plan on taking him to the doctors over this as it is a a major concern to me and I really can’t carry on like it. His little sister is 3 and is completely toilet trained and never had one poo insidance I just don’t know what to do! Can anyone please give me advice??

If he WAS clean and dry and this is a new development this isn't a toilet training issue I wouldn't have thought but a medical one.

He may have a uti, or other infection or have a food intolerance... Really you need to take him to dr.

If he is constipated then you need to look at his diet. Does he eat enough fruit and veg? If he was dry for a year then possibly stress causing this retrospective behaviour. Go to gp and ask for federal to specialist nurse. Could he be stressed/bullied at school?

You need to take him to the GP. If he is constipated the stool could be pressing on his bladder meaning he can't empty fully which can cause uti's or accidents around toileting. The leakage of stool will likely be overflow around the hard mass of stool. He sounds as if he needs a disimpaction routine prescribed.

Sounds like chronic constipation has stretched up the last part of his gut with hard poo, which he can't pass, so liquid poo from higher up the gut is leaking past. Because of the stretching, sensation doesn't work properly, so they don't know they're doing it. A really bunged up bowel tends to confuse bladder signals, and make it hard to properly empty the bladder, and make water infections more likely, so cause urinary accidents.

How much medication is he on for his constipation? Absolutely agree with 123bananas that he really sounds like he needs disimpaction (lots and lots of movicol/laxido laxative medication to get rid of all the old poo). He'd then need to be on a lesser amount for a long time to let his gut shrink back down and recover.

Get him to the GP. You may find eric.org.uk a useful website.

Having some experience of this I would suggest the GP guide you to a psychologist; not necessarily a child psychologist as, having discussed this with one, I am given to understand there are well understood functional/ psychological reasons why a child may, unexpectedly, start to soil themselves. For reassurance, it need not involve bullying, or, let's say, something particularly traumatic. This is my anecdotal experience. I would have every confidence that a psychologist would be able to provide solid empathetic support. Good luck.

I had this with DS1. Its stress from starting school. Talk to his teacher and doctor. It did pass eventually. It took along time and was very difficult to deal with and he moved schools.
He also wasn’t dry at night until he was nearly 9.
Might sound funny but take him for an eye test and get them to check his binocular vision. Lots of children have this problem and it makes school very stressful.
He now has glasses with prisms and tints and his reading/writing has improved and he’s less stressed.