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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

Potty training 19 month old

22 replies

greenducks · 21/01/2018 18:42

We started sitting dd on the potty when she turned sixteen months. There has never been any pressure, and she chooses whenever she wants to.

At first she only chose to sit on the potty sometimes, but now likes to sit on it a lot, and also signs 'potty' when she would like to. Dh and I feel she is aware of when she's doing, and seems to have some control of the muscles there as well.

I recently spoke to some mum's I know about potty training dd soon, but they all said she is too young and probably won't be ready for another year. They said that at this age potty training would be a lot harder, so to wait until she's older.

I am also pregnant, and due in August so ideally would like to have dd potty trained - but of course if she isn't ready that's fine too.

I was please hoping for some advice on what to do - a part of me wants to give it a try, but then I appreciate that the more experienced mum's I know more than me about training. Thank you.

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Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 18:43

Sorry, that should say when she's "going".

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PotteringAlong · 21/01/2018 18:43

Leave it another year. She really would be very very young.

Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 18:51

Thanks - a part of me thinks we should wait, but then I'm cautious about missing out on this 'sensitive period' where she has a lot of interest in sitting on the potty, and does a lot of wees and poos on it. I worry if in a year she won't have the interest perhaps?

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DearMrDilkington · 21/01/2018 18:52

Far too young. Chances are she'll want nappies back as soon as the new baby comes anyway.

Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 19:00

Thanks, should I just keep doing as I'm doing then with no pressure? She signs to me whenever she wants to sit in the potty, and let's me know when she needs to go. She has some bladder control and is using the potty a lot at home, so I don't want to stop completely.

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teaandbiscuitsforme · 21/01/2018 19:59

I trained DD at 22 months because she started to refuse to wear nappies. She had no idea what to do, she'd never sat on a potty or anything but she was trained within a week.

I also had a cluster feeding 6 week old so it was hardly good timing! But having had 2 in nappies for a couple of weeks, only having 1 lot of nappies to change suited me far better.

What got me through - the Oh Crap potty training book. She recommends training between 20 and 30 months so you're really not far off. I would suggest reading it and see what you think then.

Bringondrunkfeb · 21/01/2018 20:04

If it’s workkng for you at home, then why not keep going with that? I wouldn’t push it out the house - my elder dd was trained fully in about 2 weeks at 2 and a half, the second dd was done in about a week at 3, both had very few accidents.

My DM and older generations all used to start at 18 months though because they didn’t have disposable nappies.

Chienrouge · 21/01/2018 20:07

DD2 was trained at 20 months. It was easy... far easier than training DD1 at 2 years 8 months (she’d learned to be much more stubborn by then).
I read ‘Oh Crap! Potty Training’ and just went for it. Dry in the daytime in 3 days, and now at 2.5 she’s dry at night too.

FayJay · 21/01/2018 20:10

You sound sensible in your approach. TBH, if she’s happy to keep going with it at home, what harm can it do to just follow her lead? She’ll be just 2 by the time her sibling arrives which is on the early side to be completely potty trained but it wouldn’t be that unusual either. And while some children do regress when anew baby arrives, it’s not a given either.

Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 20:48

Thank you everyone, I will definitely look into buying that book as well. I may bring the potty downstairs for now, so that dd can see it whenever she would like to use it. We aren't in a rush, so will just see how we go I think.

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theredjellybean · 21/01/2018 20:51

Both my dds potty trained at 20 months.
Took a couple of weeks, both were telling me when they were doing a poo in their nappies by that point so I thought they must be able to recognise the sensation.

NoodieRoodie · 21/01/2018 20:58

Mine were 22, 19 and 23 months when out of nappies so it's perfectly possible. I didn't decide to potty train with my first just got sick of the fighting over nappy changing so basically said there's the potty I won't put a nappy on but wee there. I was also very pregnant when 1 and 2 came out of nappies so it wasn't an ideal time to be running up and down stairs emptying potties! I started off with all three by doing no nappy in the house but nappy for out and about but within a week none of them wanted a nappy at all. I would say have a go but no pressure on either of you and if it doesn't work out she's only tiny and try again later in the year

Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 21:03

Thanks, it's nice to hear others experiences. My dd also knows when she's going in her nappy, and on the potty I can see that she is trying to go (and does about half of the time she tries).

I think I may buy the recommended book and see what to do from there. What we are doing right now is working well, so we will carry on with that until we decide.

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Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 21:06

Thank you, I think a relaxed approach like that would work well for us too. I do like the idea of trying on the younger side, as then if it doesn't work there is no pressure and we can try again later on.

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Fruitboxjury · 21/01/2018 21:10

You know your child best, if does sound like lots of the right signs are there but my concern would be control. It’s one thing recognising the sensation, but it’s another being able to wait to find a toilet for a few minutes when you’re out.

DS trained just before he was 3 in one week, DD trained at about 2 1/2 in one week. Both went cold turkey (read the books and block out your diary for a few days!). We’ve had no problems, they were both ready... my DD in fact just decided one day that was the day... and never looked back.

The only people I have ever heard of with problems are ones who have started too early (often before age 2), left it too late (usually after 3), or where children have other worries such as anxiety.

In a nutshell, it sounds like you’re doing amazingly and I can understand you not wanting to give up on all the hard work, or to give mixed messages on when nappies are appropriate. However, I would take it slowly (especially out of the house) and personally I would aim for about age 2 to really finish. Don’t worry too much about new baby, you’ll be spending a lot of time at home and that’s by far the best place to potty train.

Good luck

PeaceLoveAndDixie · 21/01/2018 21:55

I've said this on here before but basically the difference between potty training at say 18m rather than 3yrs is the ability for the child to 'wait'.
With elimination communication (EC) even a newborn baby gives cues when they need to go and the focus is on the parent learning and recognising them and giving the baby the opportunity to 'potty'. A 12-18m old can communicate very well hence many PPs having great success with this method.
Waiting until a child can physiologically 'retain' urine and faeces for your convenience results in many, many months of, for you, changing dirty nappies and, for your child, sitting in dirty nappies.

PeaceLoveAndDixie · 21/01/2018 22:00

Sorry, posted too soon. My point is that is sounds like your dd can express her toilet needs to you really well so as long as you're prepared to take her as soon as she needs to go (could be tricky with a baby) I'm sure she will be dry in no time

Original poster

greenducks · 21/01/2018 22:33

Thanks again everyone, I've been feeling so unsure of myself so it's nice to have some food for thought. I definitely wouldn't feel ready to go nappy free out of the house, but will see how the next few weeks at home go and take it from there. As I said we're in no rush, so if dd just isn't ready that's fine too.

She actually had an accident on the bathroom floor a few days ago, and picked up a wipe and started cleaning it up. Of course this isn't expected of her at all and I properly cleaned it up, but it was interesting seeing how aware she was that she had weed on the floor. She knows how to 'try' on the potty and when she's been, but I just don't know if she would understand how to wait until we get to the potty right now.

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annawilson12 · 27/01/2018 16:01

Trust your instincts- you know your daughter best, not other mums. They only know thier children best. Keep doing what your doing and see how it goes. Babies can hold their wee and poo for a short time from birth, long enough to find a suitable place, potty , loo etc.

Offyougo · 27/01/2018 16:05

It's not too early. If she got the connection between feeling the need to per and the potty it's done. Keep her nappy free in the house, when out remember to take her to toilet regularly. That's what I did, and they potty trained at 18 and 20 months(meaning by that time they could tel when they needed the toilet and ask for it)few accidents at the start now very reliable.

Offyougo · 27/01/2018 16:06

As to having to wait till you get to the potty it's just a matter of muscle control she'll get it quickly

caraway33 · 27/01/2018 16:47

Sounds like you should really give it a go!

I didn’t really train my dd, she was 18months and just happened to spend a lot of time without a nappy at home and somehow to my surprise, realised a potty is where the pee/poo goes. We still used a nappy for going out but by 19months decided to see if we can manage without- and we did! Took just a day at the time but that turned into weeks and months. Hardly any accidents.
She is turning 2 next month but still not verbal, so earlier used to take her to a public toilet every hour but by now she learned in own way to “say” if needs to go.

Some kids are ready really early on and it doesn’t need to be a struggle.

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