You know how they say that they all get it eventually?

[GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal]

And that no child ever went off to university in nappies?

Well, DS is going to be the one that does. He's never going to get it. Never, ever, ever. I'm going to be cleaning up his poos and wees till I'm incontinent myself.

If he just doesn't seem to notice he's weeing (all over the floor) but then when I comment on it has the bladder control to stop it, is he ready or not?!

He's 3.5. Due to start school in September. I don't know how I'm going to get him fully toilet trained by then, he can't even use the potty!

You need to teach him to link it

I just weed -> I am weeing -> I need to wee

If he starts to wee, what do you do? I'd suggest you should be telling him to hold it whilst lifting him go the toilet. This links the feeling of weeing with moving to the toilet.

I say "oh, you're weeing, let's try and get that in the potty" and move him to it - at which point he stops and holds it in. Shortly after getting off the potty, he'll start again.

I've asked him why he wees on the floor instead of in the potty, and get "because I just did" or "I don't know" in response.

Don’t give up hope, Ds cracked it about three days before he started school - I was dreading going in and saying he was in nappies. We ended up spending pretty much the whole summer doing sticker charts, rewards and anything else to get him there.

I'd do it with more urgency personally - 'hold it' and lift to the toilet. Then you need to get him to release if he's still holding it. Listening for the wee can be a good trick as it takes the pressure off. I also used to sing to DD - where's the wee wee, ca you hear? Can you hear the wee wee? etc.

DS1 was 3.75 before he stopped shitting his pants EVERY SINGLE DAY. He could talk me through what he should do if he needs a poo very articulately but wouldn't actually do it. The best part of a year this went on. Until one day he did.

It's so worrying with school looming and I really feel your pain. He has got time to get this, it's such a slog for you though. Chin up.

Haribos.
desperate times.

Also don't ask him why he did it. Just acknowledge it - you've weed on the floor. Next time you need to use the potty. And move on. This is the first stage (I've weed), moving to the potty whilst weeing/holding the wee is the next phase (I am weeing). The goal is anticipating it - I need to wee.

If it's any consolation I am a reception teacher, in September i had a lot of worried parents coming to me with your same concerns. We've had so few accidents even I am shocked. The children do just 'get it' when school starts, they see the other kids doing it, it's a new and different environment and for lots of them it just clicks into place. Please don't let school stress you out, any good teacher will reassure you and endeavour to help with the potty training. Good luck! Rewards are fab, for some kids stickers aren't motivating enough, make it something he reeeally wants.

Ds liked the potty that played a tune when you wee in it, it encouraged him a bit

Ds1 took forever. We started when he was 3. Just wee'd on the floor. Put him back in pull-ups. He's cracked it now at 3.8yo. Has been fine for about 3months. What worked for us was a sticker reward chart. So he got a sticker for weeing/ pooing in the toilet. 10 stickers he got a present. (Hot wheels car or chocolate wrapped up). Next set of 10 stickers were for no accidents in his pull up. Next 10 for asking to use toilet. Next 10 for wearing pants. Etc. Took about 100 stickers. Last step is dry at night which he's almost cracked but has been ill so we're delaying til after christmas. His 20mo brother has been copying him shouting wee wee and sitting on toilet and weeing on demand. He has his own chart.
I think starting nursery in september may also have helped. Seeing other kids do it and the routine.

Bloody hell, his grandma has had a breakthrough! He stayed at hers last night and she got him to wee in his potty twice! That's more success in 24 hours than we've had in months!

Then today, after an accident and a lot of potty refusals, just as I was thinking it was something he was only going to do for my mum, I got called in from the kitchen to admire the wee he'd just done - unprompted - in his potty!

I don't want to speak too soon, but we may actually be making some progress

OP that's brilliant. There is light at the end of the tunnel!

It had been going so well...!

All through the Christmas holidays he was brilliant - no accidents, all poos and wees in the potty or toilet. He even stayed dry overnight a couple of times, and told me when we are at the library that he needed to go, and managed to hold it while I got him to the loo - a huge step for him as he hates public toilets (scared of the hand driers). I honestly thought he'd finally cracked it.

Then yesterday DH went back work and DD to school and it's like he regressed 6 months! Yesterday he weed all over himself, and earlier today he pooed all over himself.

So fed up. I'd been so looking forward to telling pre-school on Monday that he's finally toilet trained but it feels like we're back to square 1. Why will he do it for his dad and his grandma but not me??!