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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

4 year will only poo in nappy

16 replies

FullMoon072 · 28/05/2017 11:00

My 4 year old won't poo in the toilet only in a nappy. She wont poo in her underwear either only a nappy. What can I do to help her use the toilet? I asked her why she wont she said incase it splashes her. I put a bit toilet roll in for her but she still refuses to even try.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

thethoughtfox · 28/05/2017 12:21

Tell her there's no more nappies. When it comes to poo time tell her mummy will be there for her. You could try cuddling her and saying 'Mummy is here. We can do this together' while on the toilet. I have to do this with dd when we are in public toilets.

thethoughtfox · 28/05/2017 12:21

There's no more nappies left.

justkeepswimmingg · 31/05/2017 15:44

I once looked after a 4/5 year old who did this. Her mum and dad put a nappy on her before bed to let her poo. It did her no favours. Tell DD that there are no more nappies. Sit with her on the toilet for as long as she needs, and reward her for trying and succeeding.
The little girl that I looked after made herself so constipated that she made herself bleed after every poo, and it scared her even more to go. It's was a nasty vicious cycle she was putting herself through, and the poos were like nothing I had ever seen. She did eventually grow more confident to use the toilet often, to at least try going. Not sure what happened after that as she started school, and I no longer cared for her. But it's definitely a habit you want to break OP.

Radishal · 31/05/2017 15:53

Put the nappy open over a potty.
Start there.
Grit your teeth and make sitting on the loo loads of fun. Blow bubbles together- this makes all the right muscles work.
And wine/tea/chocolate for yourself - whatever works.

Mumofoneboy4 · 17/08/2017 21:04

Hi. My little boy is the same. He was 4 a few weeks ago and starts school next month. He knows what to do, he knows why and he knows how. He has a genuine fear of pooing in the toilet that does not phase him with weeing at all. We've tried everything and had short lived success this week with cutting a hole in his nappy - this worked 2 days in a row and then today he is back to genuine fear of even this. I wondered if you got anywhere with your little girl and if so, how?

user1495997773 · 05/09/2017 07:36

Anyone have any more ideas? My DD is really struggling with this too, but like PPs have said, is happy to sit on the toilet for wees...

Thesunrising · 05/09/2017 20:45

There's a useful post on the ERIC website that has tips on how to gradually encourage children out of the habit. www.eric.org.uk/pdf-children-who-will-only-poo-in-a-nappy

user1495997773 · 05/09/2017 21:42

Thanks Thesunrising, will have a good read X

Secondtimesally · 05/09/2017 21:45

I have just gotten my 3 year old off the nappy by bribery. Lollipop or sweetie (multivitamin jelly will do).

Have you tried a nice toilet seat if she's afraid of falling in?

user1495997773 · 05/09/2017 21:46

Thanks Thesunrising, will have a good read X

user1495997773 · 05/09/2017 21:49

Hi Secondtimesally, my DD has a toilet seat and a step, and will happily sit on it to do wees, so I don't think she's scared of the toilet as such. As pooing is different to weeing, I'm wondering if she just hasn't figured out what's happening to her body (iykwim) yet...

HumphreyCobblers · 05/09/2017 21:51

poo goes home to pooland app

this could be helpful

Hassled · 05/09/2017 21:53

Bribery worked for one of mine. I made such a massive deal out of it - and so did he. Big drama, every day. Then I offered a chocolate button if he used the loo, and that was it.

SheepyFun · 05/09/2017 21:57

It's worth trying a potty as a step on the way - no splash.

Those saying that 'the nappies are all gone', it's really not recommended. One friend tried that, so her son started withholding his poo. He did it so much that his rectum stretched. He's 8 now, and still has to take movicol - it will never be right. He also leaks poo. That really isn't something you want for your child.

Pastaagain78 · 05/09/2017 22:10

I wouldn't advise 'the nappies are all gone' at the moment she will go all be it in a nappy. If she starts withholding you are opening a whole new can of worms that will be far harder and more painful to deal with. I would recommend a potty seat, no splash. Start with sitting on the potty with the nappy, then cutting a hole, then laying the nappy in the potty. This is not an issue that can be forced. Withholding poo is distressing for everyone. Good luck.

user1495997773 · 06/09/2017 20:45

Thanks everyone, I'm not sure if she finds the sitting on the potty/toilet position difficult to poo in... she always seems to poo in her nappy when she's down on all fours, and sometimes crawling backwards. You're right, i definitely don't want her witholding poo and all the problems that can cause!

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