Arghh. Don't know what I'm doing. Help please.

[PastaandCheese]

I think I've done everything wrong..... It's kind of happened rather than being planned...... Help me please!

DD is 2.7 and decided she would like to try her potty a few weeks ago. Since then she is dry indoors. Initially bare bottomed and now with knickers which she can pull up and down herself. I try to resist reminding her as she seems to know she needs to go.

Initially she asked for a nappy for nursery and going out which I was fine with. She now doesn't want the nappy but every time I've agreed to this she has wet herself when out.

She knows I have a 'Pottette' with me but doesn't ask for it. I ask her and she says no but then wets herself minutes later. This has happened three times now.

She is asking for a nappy to poo in which again I'm fine with.

I don't know what to do next to help her or whether to insist she wears a nappy when out?

Also, she has never used the potty at nursery. We've just had a week off but she is back Tuesday. I don't know if I should send her in knickers if she says she wants to wear them?

I am going to get a book from the library this week. In the meantime I feel a bit lost with it all as I don't know what I should be doing.

Sounds like you asking her if she needs a wee is sort of reminding her that she does need a wee.

Can you anticipate, and if she says no, tell her 'Well let's have a go anyway and just see what happens' and then find a nice spot where she can sit on her potette thing and you can have a nice cheerful chat for a bit?

Is she just too busy to know she needs a wee, or is she eg. worried about people watching?

DD was a total camel so I had to use above strategy to get her to go, and then she slowly got in the habit.

Nursery should have loads of experience and should be fine with no nappy - I would personally try and stick with no nappy now you've started.

PS sounds like it's all going brilliantly no need for a book at all, just keep it all light and positive and cheerful, sounds like you doing all right not all wrong.

I bribed DD with chocolate buttons. That's not in the books.

Too much choice can be a bit much when they are out and about with lots to do.

Perhaps you could set up a reward chart sticker/sweetie/chocolate for sitting on the potty each time you ask? Just to get her into the habit of going when out and about?

Another approach would be to go more often yourself. So after eating at a cafe make it a habit to say 'i need a wee now, let's go to the bathroom and both try together' present it more as this is what big girls do, not a choice.

Thank you. I am stressing as until now she has told me what she wants to do but I think I need to help her a bit more when we are out.

I like the idea of just trying her on the potty and giving her a button for trying whilst out.

I've definitely just been taking 'no, don't need potty' at face value when out. Partly because it's true at home and partly because I have a baby too so it's a bit of a relief if I'm honest that I don't need to find a loo that can accommodate us all including pram!

My DH has been working abroad but is back next week so at the weekends I'll have more freedom to help her. I'll make sure we are with friends this week when we're out so someone can watch the baby.

I think she will be well up for leaving her brother for a few minutes and going to the toilet with me!

Nursery is purpose built with little toilets so in theory the transition to the toilet at home should be ok if she takes to them.