why won't he tell us?

[frankiebuns]

Ok my son is 3 1/2 fantastic on number 1 side but....... he refuses to tell us when he needs a number 2 he does it in his pants and refuses to go on the loo potty etc we have tried sitting him down with a book toy tv etc but nope not until we pull pants up that boom he does it I have explained over and over but nope we have even left him in the room on his own to see if it was a privacy thing no I have said stay on after a number 1 bu he freaks and says no my wee wee will be soaked up by my poo poo! Help I'm at myh wits end!

My ds also 3 won't tell me either. He is great with wees but no use with poos.

I have had some success when he is naked as he pinches his bottom together when he starts to poo and I can get him on the toilet.

I had more success earlier when I could see him start to strain but now he has started to hide.

He was also holding poo in for upto 3 days (normally a once a day boy) but has bow stopped and is pooing daily in his pants

I have tried bribery and sticker charts but with no success

I too am at my wits ends and lurking here for any advice people have to give

Have you shown him 'poo goes to poo land?'

m.youtube.com/watch?v=Rkvdte4ZIFE

Here's a link. DS really took to it & was a poo refuser for a long time.

Tried the poo goes too poo land yesterday went down like a lead balloon, Im at my wits end

My dd is not long trained and the poo's took a few weeks to come right, she had the wee's in 24-48 hours.

I would just see her acting a bit secretive and leaving the room so I knew she was off somewhere to do a poo in her knickers.
Sometimes I'd get her in time and get her on the toilet but it was often too late. I remember asking her 'why don't you do your poo in the toilet sweetie' and she would always say 'because I don't want to'

Anyway, one day she just tole me that she needed to go to the toilet to do a poo, just like that. She went and I was so so happy and she was too and we haven't looked back since.

I think if you read child psychology literature there is alot of information on the poo's and with holding and not wanting to 'let go' in thE toilet. I'm not sure of the exact ins and outs but it is apparently very very common.

Be patient, trust me, he will get there very soon.

The worst thing you can do is him seeing you stressed about it.

Ive found with all of mine that bribery was the key.

I bought a load of desirable little objects - cars, balls, dinosaurs, books, hair bobbles, bubbles, crayons - and put them all in a basket. WHenever they sit on the toilet, I would say Oh is you do a poo, you can choose a surprise! What will it be?

No poo - no surprise.

Eventually the lure of all that desirable kid stuff becomes too much - and they manage to squeeze out a nugget. Loads of fuss, choose one toy, get a good look at all the other desirable stuff....basket goes out of reach but still in view.

They quickly realise that even a nugget will get a toy, so they produce those quite regularly, just keep up the praise and if they do a bigger poop, give bigger praise, maybe even two toys.

Thanku everyone he's been like this for weeks its grinding us down I knew he needed to go yesterday so I made a pact with him didn't work! He did a wee but no poo I pull his trousers up and bam he poos!

Hi there OP. I'm sorry I can't offer any advice, as my DS is exactly the same. And has been now for 7 months. So I will watch your thread with interest. I know that he CAN do it, as one day he asked to go poo twice, but the next day he was back to doing it in his pants. I've tried everything and am at the end of my tether. My latest thing is confiscating toys when he poos in pants, but he couldn't care less!