Fine without clothes, accidents always with clothes on

[Katie28]

Hi everyone. I wondered if anyone had experienced what we are going through with our little boy. He is 3 in March. We have had the potty out around the house for a few months and this gradually moved onto him using it to wee on whenever he had no nappy on. We were really pleased with this and thought he was ready to start proper potty training. While DH was off work for two weeks for Christmas we decided it would be a good time to do it. We told DS the nappy fairy was coming to take his daytime nappies and bring him some big boy pants. He helped pack up the nappies and was really excited to find a bag full of pants the next morning.

Here is the problem! He is great with no nappy on. He actively seeks out the potty and uses it for wees and poos. As soon as we put even just a pair of pants on he seems to forget he isn't wearing a nappy and wees/poos in his pants every time. We tried asking regularly if he needed the potty and putting him on it every so often but he was very resistant and screamed so we didn't push it. Now we are trying the reverse psychology of "I bet you can't wee on the potty" and he seems to like this at the minute so we can get him to the potty and it does result in some wees but he still wees in his pants not long after. I know he will get it eventually but does anyone have any tips on how to encourage him onto the potty and to help him remember his pants are not a nappy! He starts his 3 hours at nursery each morning from April and I don't want him to be the only one in nappies! I also don't want to go backwards now we have taken the nappies away. We are being very relaxed about accidents but I'm worried there seems to be no real improvement yet.

Thanks in advance for your words of wisdom :-)

Could you maybe try something in-between a bare bum and fully clothed, how about just have pj bottoms on so he still has lots of space round his bum that doesn't feel nappy-like but it will get him into the habit of having to remove clothing.

My 2 year old has just decide to potty train herself and I think the reason she has got it so quickly is because we have been able to be at home a lot and she has been able to spend a lot of time in pjs which she can pull down herself and quickly.

That's a good idea I will try that tomorrow, thank you!

Hello. Just wanted to let you know we had exactly the same experience. Started letting my son, then 2.4, run around 'bottomless' at home, and altogether it wasn't too bad, but the minute you put anything on him - I also tried loose clothes, so he might not notice - the potty was just forgotten. I'm afraid it hasn't got much better. He's now 3.4, and has been nappiless in daytime since starting Kindergarten mid-September (when he turned 3). They don't want them to wear nappies, and just send him home every day with various soiled bottom-halves (they have a good stock there). It seemed to be getting better, before Christmas - we had several days of no soiled clothes in Kindergarten - but this week it's just been a catastrophe, and he's started pooing in his pants, which we thought at least had been cracked.
I'm afraid I have no helpful tips, but it's good to read in this forum that we are not alone.
PS his big sister, needless to say, got potty trained in about 2 weeks, and was completely dry, even at night, before she was 3. Sigh.

• Anne (who lives in Germany, and is thrilled to be on mumsnet ;-) )

Hi I'm another one who's glad to see we aren't alone. DS 2.7 is exactly the same. Canfield a full day without an accident if he is naked from the waist down but the moment I put on a pair of big boy pants he wets. Will also try the loose pjs thanks. I'm thinking of waiting another few weeks now, I start mat leave at the end if the month. What are the chances we'll be done before baby arrives?! Good luck everyone and ill be keeping an eye out.

Hello, we are having the same problem with our daughter who is 2 years and 5 months old. She very quickly grasped the potty with wee's and poo's without a nappy, even attempts to wipe afterwards but has accidents every time we put loose trousers on her. She doesn't even attempt to pull down her trousers or sometimes be aware she has done anything. I've bought training pants but not sure how they will help? We have been very relaxed about accidents and always encourage her to do it on the potty. Her speech is really good and she understands most things so this is a bit frustrating! Is this normal? Any tips gratefully received!! Thanks. Ps I'm new to mumsnet!!