Help! Stubborn 3yo refusing to potty train

[Piffpaffpoff]

Title says it all really. DD has just turned 3 and will not even entertain the idea of peeing in a potty or toilet. I can get her to sit on a potty (this in itself is progress from a few months ago) but she will not pee. She waits til she's off the potty and then just goes in her pants. She refuses to talk about it and if we try to talk about toilets, potties or her not wearing nappies she just refuses to engage, either putting her hands over her ears or over our mouths to stop us speaking. I have tried bribing her to do it but she us digging her heels in, big-style. We've also tried a variety of books, which she loves reading but refuses to copy. Just to be clear, we've tried all of these things over the course of the last few months, but we're not on her case about it all day every day!

I've been relatively relaxed about it up until now but since she turned three I really feel that she's old enough to do it and should be trained by now. Has anyone got any other suggestions about how to get such a potty-refuser to give it a go? Thanks!

Thanks Cara2244, I think I will put DC2 in disposable for a few months, then in cloth once DD is toilet trained.
Is your 2.9 trained now?

Hi, Can I join?
My DD is 2.11(so nearly 3). I tried in august but had no luck so have left it for a while.
Tried again this morning, put her in pants and about an hour later it was "Mummy I done a poop" so I tried to get her to sit on potty to finish poo, then tried toilet but she didn't want to do either. I then put nappy back on cause I was thinking if she won't sit on potty/toilet it's not going to work?.
Anyway she has pooed again in nappy so I need to go and clean her up and maybe try her in pants again.
Any advice?

Hi
Can I also join?
DD is 3.1 and is supposed to be potty trained before she starts nursery in January.
we have tried to leave her nappy off but she just stays on her changing mat saying "nappy on, nappy on"
We have explained that she needs to be potty trained before nursery but she says "I will go to nursery and use potty then"
We have tried sitting her on the potty (a potty she picked) but she will either sit on it with her nappy/trousers on but no without. She wont even go anywhere near the toilet.
How are we meant to toilet train her?

BackPack - My brother told me my niece was the same before starting nursery and as soon as she was there, saw all the other children not in nappies and got it within days. Not sure how that helps though, just that her nursery were not too worried as they predicted it!

A cautiously optimistic update from the OP......

Having made virtually no progress since I started this thread, we decided to give it another go while we were at home for a few days over the holidays. I'd done a bit of reading about it and came across the same info that neverquitesure posted about and decided to give it a go.

So last night, before she went to bed, we had a chat about pees and poos belonging in the potty and it being her job to make sure they got there and that if they accidentally got in her pants then we would just get new pants. She was very excited about this! My part of the deal is that i do not mention the potty at all to her now, no stress no pressure.

And lo and behold, today she did a truly massive poo in the potty and then a couple of hours later, a pee in it too. A double first!! I am flabbergasted. She even tried to sit on the toilet, which she as never done before. And no accidents on the floor (I'm slightly worried that she's only done one pee, but hey, shows she's got good bladder control I guess).

I realise this is only day one, but I am absolutely amazed at what she has achieved. She and I are both very stubborn so this idea of handing responsibility to her and me to stop trying to 'control' her really seems to be working.

Fingers crossed we do as well tomorrow!

Glad to find this thread! DD2 (3 at beginning of Feb) wants to wear knickers but won't sit on the potty or toilet and just poos or wees in her pants- have tried it for days at a time, probably two or three attempts but no improvement. Not even for chocolate buttons. She says she is "too little!" DD1 got it in 3/4 days when she was 2.5. I might try different bribery - she is obsessed with money at the moment (!) perhaps coins for her purse will make the difference.

Today's update - one accident and one HUGE pee in the potty. She was v upset at the accident but I didn't make a fuss, just changed her and reminded that pees go in the potty. We did also visit the toilet approximately 20 times and she is now able to get on and off by herself. I cannot believe the progress she is making, it's great!