Holding in wee

[Bellini12]

I have been training my 2.11 year old DD for a week now (unfortunately was waiting for her to show any interest but it was never forthcoming).

We started off with the usual 'accidents' and were getting a few wees in the potty but it was mainly because the wee had started coming so got her to the potty in time rather than her instigating it. But now we have the extreme whereby she is holding her wee's in ALL DAY. This is the 3rd day - it's 5pm now - and despite many trips to the potty and her indicating it's hurting she just cannot seem to relax for it to come out spontaneously. She has been dry ALL day - that's not normal! On the plus side it's good she has learnt some control then just before bed when she can hold it no longer she fills an entire potty! She is going to get a bladder infection at this rate. I'm really concerned....

Any tips please? I'm doing the sticker chart & even chocolate button bribe but it's like she hasn't learnt to relax her muscles yet. I've run out of ideas and am getting desperate.

Thank you.

Will she pee in the bath (my DD pooed in hers today, think the warm water helped her relax)? Or is the pressure just too much and worth putting her back in nappies again then trying again in a couple of weeks? Or can you distract her - DD sometimes finds it hard to go (we're only a few days in); today she told me that it wasn't working so I offered to put the tap on for her and as I walked over to the sink she suddenly started peeing - I think she was so intrigued by what I was offering to do that it took her mind off the pee!

My DS did this at 2.8. We put him back in nappies after 4 days, then a week later he asked for pants, and bingo!

Please put your DD back in nappies for a while. We have this exact same problem with DS2 and the urologist has advised that they can not only get urine infections by doing this but also overstretch the bladder. Like Bikeskirun says - she may volunteer to do it herself in a few weeks.

whilst lots of other overly competitive parents and grandparents may pass comment on a nearly 3yo being in nappies, it's really no big deal (and the urologist said that DS2's potty training issues weren't even "on his radar" because he considers 3yo to still be very young)

Thank you for your comments. She finally burst at 6.30pm last night despite trips to the potty every few minutes. It was horrible, she was screaming & crying and telling me to stop it coming out. All I could do was hold and reassure her.

I've been so worried about her getting a bladder infection that I did put her in a pull-up, but she still wouldn't go and was treating it like pants & many trips to the potty... I would happily go back to nappies (yes I've had the comments and raised eye-brows but only from the older generation who of course had us all out of nappies at 18 months!) but she wasn't peeing under any circumstances - pants or nappies.

The good news is that we've had 2 pees in the potty today - no pain so far. Maybe she did get the message that she gets tummy ache if she holds it in or is finally learning the technique? A bit early to say. Slightly wet pants & a big poo in them (will worry about that later!) but on the whole better. Phew!

I've been using potty training pants sometimes when we go out if I know we're not near a loo (but so far they are always dry). I was wondering if it's best to hold on & find a loo (as in life) or use a potette?

glad she finally weed -DS has had lots of these episodes of crying hysterically as it finally comes out

great news that she is weeing on the potty - i would recommend giving her reward/praise for every wee she does - even if she wees on the floor etc. Obviously double the reward/praise if she wees in the potty