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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

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Original poster

Wee in the potty no issues, POO another matter entirely.

21 replies

largeginandtonic · 20/06/2011 11:44

I am not new to this. Dd2 is child number 7. This is a new issue for me though.

She is blardy brilliant at weeing in the potty. She has been potty training for a week and not one wee accident.

Poo however... not ONE in the potty. All in pants. I am flummoxed. I have tried encouraging, rewards etc.. she see's all the other children use the toilet, she even tells us all where the poo should go.

What can i do?

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soniaweir · 20/06/2011 13:47

i feel for you as i am going through the same thing so can't give you any advise but would love to hear what other peoples experience is? i have been doing it for nearly 2 months now and like you he's cracked the wee (bar a couple of accidents here and there) but all poos are in his pants or in his night nappy. he does do the occassional one in the potty but it's so rare that i feel like giving up. Help!!!

Original poster

largeginandtonic · 20/06/2011 15:10

Ahhh a kindred spirit! At least i am not alone.

Let's hope some help shows up quickly < pleads >

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Indith · 20/06/2011 15:20

I know you've had a gazillion of dcs but the poo in pants thing is not at all uncommon, loads of children do it or some ask for a nappy, do the poo then ask to have their pants back. She knows where it should go but if you think about it, doing a poo is scary business and for some kids takes a bit of a build up of sensation before it is time for it to come out so they might just feel more comfortable taking themselves off into a corner and doing it in their pants or she may just be taking a bit longer to tell the difference between the "poo is close" feeling and "poo is coming right now" feeling. (dd still gets muddled up sometimes!) It has only been a week!

socialhandgrenade · 20/06/2011 15:23

Same here. My DS seems a bit freaked by seeing poo so we are working on that first. We talk about how the poos go down the toilet to poo land (there's an on-line resource somewhere called poo goes to poo land where I got the idea). We have gone back into pull-ups til he's more ok with seeing poo. I'd be glad of any helpful advice, it is frustrating to have had him potty trained in terms of wees but gone back to nappies.

bessie26 · 20/06/2011 15:35

I don't have much experience of actual potty training (DD1 still in nappies) but I did read something somewhere about cutting a hole in the nappy & getting them to sit on the potty in the nappy??

It seemed a bit of a weird idea to me, but thought I'd mention it incase it helped!

okiecokie · 20/06/2011 21:05

I went through this a couple of weeks ago for about 3 weeks in total. Wees were fine but poos in potty or toilet were usually done in the pants. DS was actually holding on to his poos for some time and I knew he needed to go as he would always go each day at the same time. He wasn't afraid of the potty but he clearly feared doing a poo in it. I can only assume it was the strange sensation combined with not being used to doing a poo seated (he would always do his poo standing up).

As time went he clearly knew that he should be doing the poo in the potty but would still do it in his pants. He would complain his bottom hurt so a knew a poo was coming but he would be on and off the potty like a yo-yo. Eventually my DH sat with him in the bathroom (DH on the toilet and DS near the potty) and allowed him to stand up and just as the poo started to come out (TMI?) he plonked him on the potty. He was over the moon! Lots of reward and praise etc..We even had a poo party (Mummy, Daddy and sister on the bed and we all had a chocolate biscuit and a treat from the treat jar). We still had more poos in pants but for about every 5 poos one would be in the potty. Every time I would just say "never mind but you know the poo prefers to be in the toilet then he can go straight down the toilet to see all his friends. You are a big boy and big boys do their poos in the potty/toilet"

Eventually he just "got it". I think it just needs time and a lot of support and encouragement. If they understand that the poo should be done in the potty then you are half way there.

Original poster

largeginandtonic · 21/06/2011 11:15

Hmmmm. She knows when the poo is coming and can hold it. She is on and off the potty like a yo yo as she knows she needs to poo. I think it may be the potty position (a bot like standing up boy ) She like to crouch when pooing.

I have a potette potty for when we are out and about, it is teeny and close to the floor so she has to almost crouch to sit on it. We are going to try that today.

The others have had poo accidents when training but poo and wee. The poo has never been an exclusive issue iyswim? Kids are all different!

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okiecokie · 22/06/2011 09:59

The on and off potty like a yo yo thing sounds very familiar then. At least she is not just simply refusing to sit on it to do a poo. You are nearly there, don't loose hope!

Jane7 · 22/06/2011 10:10

I agree okiecokie and largeg&t - what is it about the leaping on and off potty. I'm about at the same stage as both of you and when my dd needs to poo, she tells me her bottom hurts, so we troupe off to the potty, she sits for a bit, but then just as she feels things moving, she is liable to leap up and run away as though scared of it actually coming out. It's quite a task to get her to stay still.
At that point, I have to be quiet firm with her and tell her, she needs to stay on potty, or mention the treat (usually an episode of octonauts on the iplayer) that she will get if she does the poo on potty.
Good luck and let me know how you all get on

Original poster

largeginandtonic · 22/06/2011 15:35

She pooed on the potty (mini potty) this morning. I told her she could have a mini chocolate egg if she did a poo. She covets them, they live in a glass jar in the kitchen and are amost savoured treat. It obviously worked!

So my advice to those struggling is buy something they REALLY want and stick it in a jar in the kitchen so it is always visible, build them up for a few weeks, then offer it as reward for poo

Of course DH did make up a little story about the linning in the pottete potty. It has frogs printed all over it and dh said the frogs like you to poo on their head.

I am going with the chocolate myself

OP posts:

juliemossford17 · 23/06/2011 15:21

Agree with largeginandtonic

my 2nd son was so young & quick with wees, but would ask for a nappy to be put on him when he wanted a poo

bought a big pack of matchbox cars & placed them in plain site of the potty. He got to choose one each time he did a poo in the potty. Within a matter of days he had all of the cars & never looked back!!!

okiecokie · 25/06/2011 09:54

Oh yes, bribery is the way forward...

xxsaralouxxx · 25/06/2011 17:41

Glad it'snot just me - 2.3 yr old DS has pees cracked but so far has ended up in the shower twice today due to 'poo accidents'! Bribery patience and repitition are obv the way forward - have nearly given up myself a few times, until I think about all the hadr work and think 'I'm not bloody going through that all over again!'
Good luck! :)

why5am · 01/07/2011 21:17

So good to know we're not alone. 3 weeks after ditching nappies and with just one wee accident, DD (2.4yrs) had her first poo on the toilet today. Followed by several in the pants over the rest of the day.
We have a special book to read on the potty and a sticker for 'trying' to poo. And even more special Peppa stickers for the event itself.

We started that yesterday, maybe a glimmer of hope?! I think she's embarrassed/anxious. She takes herself outside/away to poo in her knickers despite us trying to be very fuss-free about it all. In today's toilet success she took herself to the loo quietly without any suggestion or supervision from me.
I'm hoping it's just a matter of time and patience!

kansasmum · 01/07/2011 22:20

Oh you have my sympathy! My little boy (now 4) did wees no problem but all poos were in the pants- he was 3 and a bit and I seriously thought he would never get it.
We went on holiday and I said no pooping in his swimming shorts or he would have to get out the pool. Day 2 of holiday he pooped in his shorts at about 5pm so I said right no more swimming.

That was it- never looked back. All of a sudden it just clicked and once he did a few poos in the loo/potty it was like everything fell into place.

So hang in there your little one will get there- honestly. I thought my boy would go to school in pull ups- seriously but he is fabulous now!

Deborah14 · 06/07/2011 13:58

I can't tell you how reassuring it is to read all these posts. My dd is 2.6 and we are in week 2 of training. She's doing really well with the pee's mostly making the potty, just the odd accident but the poo's are a different story altogether. This morning I caught her just as she started the motions but as soon as I sat her on the loo she seized up and waited until her pants were back on. We're currently trying bribery, hopefully it won't be long until it just clicks!

oak1 · 10/07/2011 09:06

I am in the same boat here. My boy is 2.7 and wees seem to be no problem now (he got over his fear of weeing in public!)

But poos are done in his pants. Very messy.

I have been trying the sticker thing but may have to move on to chocolate!

radiohelen · 11/07/2011 15:10

Thank the lord it's not just us. My ds is great at wees. He has been for a while. I'm starting seriously today with pants and no nappy at all in the day. The sticker chart is filling up nicely but he will not tell me when he wants to do a poo. In the pants all the way .
I've read all sorts of stuff about giving them things to push against, cutting holes in nappies, fear of losing a part of themselves..... frankly it scares the pants off me... if you'll pardon the pun.
We've got playgroup tomorrow and I don't know if I should send him with pull ups or not. What would you do?

p99gmb · 12/07/2011 21:00

well.. I was just about to start a thread and I found you...

Our foster 'son' is 2.3yrs old and has for a few weeks been wee-ing quite happily in the potty... a couple of poos my mistake...

he can hold his poo all day, I guess as he knows he gets a nappy on at night.. who taught them to be so 'cunning' and 'clever'..??

I guess the message is, keep trying, bribe, reward and bribe some more

germl · 14/07/2011 20:06

My DS is 2.8yrs old and has been doing the same, luckily as he's had a bad virus for a week so has been wearing a nappy (gets us to take his nappy off to wee in the potty) as he's been sleeping a lot, we've only had 1 poo in the pants incident. However, he will not sit on the potty for a wee; no amount of bribery or fanciful tales will get him to sit on the bloody thing! He's been dry for 2 weeks and although we say to him about sitting down and we are persistent in talking about it (my DH has even taken to peeing on the toilet sat down to try to get our DS to do it) he refuses. Anyone helping him has to hold the potty, as the mess if we don't is terrible. Before potty training properly began we got him to sit on it with and without clothes, so it's not like he hasn't even done it.

So, how do I get him to sit on it for a poo if I can't even manage to get him to sit for a wee? We've been letting him see his own poo (he is a bit fascinated) and he can tell you where it all goes etc so it isn't the poo he is scared of, and I know it must be weird as he poos standing up, but I feel like he'll never get it as it's almost like he's starting from scratch as he won't sit down......arrrgggghhh!

p99gmb · 15/07/2011 21:07

Yey.. 2 poos in the potty today... had been over 24 hours since his last poo so I think we 'caught' it just right... he got loads of praise, stickers and have put up a sticker chart too... probably back to square 1 tomorrow but certainly bare bum as much as practically possible seems to help.. I took him to the park with just his shorts on (no nappy or training pants) and he stayed clean & dry.. in fact he saw a slightly older boy leaning against a tree with a bare bum having a wee and he wanted to try - and he did it!!!

lap of honour... but knowing we may well struggle and have a battle of wills again..

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