5 year old having accidents and doesn't care!

[Grabaspoon]

I am writing this on behalf of a friend.

Her just turned 5 year old has been toilet trained for almost 3 years now - however about 6 months ago he got lazy and started having accidents - ie would be playing and someone would realise he'd pooed or wee'd himself.

We wondered if it was to do with big school as he once mentioned that boys that had accidents couldn't go to school, but that doesn't seem to be an issue - he will have the occasional accident there but for the most part is dry.

Friend mentioned that the other day they had a big day out and he was fine/dry all day yet 10 minutes at home and he wet himself!! He doesn't seem to care when he has accidents and rewards/sanctions don't seem to help.

Any ideas.

:)

first port of call would be GP to rule out an infection or constipation

also school loos are terrifying for a lot of children

Will mention the GP, But he's dry at school and when they're out and about - it tends to be at home that he has "accidents"

Thanks anyway :)

After ruling out physical causes, I'd examine psychological ones. Any big life change such as illness/hospitalisation of family member, or a death, moving house, new sibling, bullying by sibling or neighbours children, separation or divorce, or lots of rows, parents new partner, or even anxiety about something else can all affect a previously reliably trained child. School problems are also causes, but not in this case it seems.

Obviously you want to help your friend, and don't want to pry into the home circumstances, but she may not be aware just how much wetting and soiling can be linked to the child's emotional state.