reconsidering my faith, I can ^feel^ where I want to head but don't know where to turn

[AphroditesGrannyNightie]

Sorry if this is a bit heavy.

I was raised a catholic, I belived and never questioned those beliefs until I got older and started to disagree wqith some of the catholic ideals.

I also believe in God, a God, but Im not sure if its the traditional catholic one.

Ever since I was about 10 I ahve been interested in more natural forms of worship. Its hard to expalin but I feel more like I should be giving thanks to the earth, mother earth.

I like the idea of insense, candles, that sort of thing.

I don't know if I want to get involved in any kind of specific religion in all honesty, alot of the religions that seem to sway this way seem (no offence) quite scary, but that could be because Im an outsider.

Is it OK to just go along an d do my own thing?

Im really confused right now and am terrified I am betraying my own God, but when I feel deep within I just dont believe it all, I believe in god but the whole Catholic view is not mine.

You could try the beliefomatic see what it says.

How does your belief in God differ from what you call "the traditional catholic one"?

As for more natural forms of worship, there's nothing wrong with giving thanks to the God who created nature.

If you are worried about betraying him, ask him to guide you to where you should be going? Its not as daft as it seems! I found it helped enormously when I was searching for a spiritual home!

I mean I believe in God but I don't belive in the bible, that he sent down a son, wine into water etc ... not because I don't believe in miracles but just because its not somethigni 'feel.'

I also feel strongly that God is a female form of somesort.

Hmmm I got 100% neo paganism on that thing

1. Neo-Pagan (100%)
2. Hinduism (96%)
3. Unitarian Universalism (88%)
4. Mahayana Buddhism (84%)
5. Jainism (81%)

Catholosism was way down the list at 20.

How about reading some books about various different beliefs or feminist theology?

Thats really strange as Ive always been drawn to wicca.

I was just thinking that tinfoil,

trip to the library needed i think.

Welcome AphroditesGranny.

You could be me and I am happy to say I am following a lovely path through the forest, up several mountains and across a few seas. I'm not sure where I'm going but I quite like it. The most uncomfortable thing is what I say if anyone actually asks me specifically what I believe - why they would I don't know but it just seems easier if you can say that you are a christian, jewish,buddist etc.

Essentially I like to be true to myself and I don't believe the bible. Like you it doesn't feel right. Wicca has always seemed scary to me in the way you describe. Try looking into hedgewitch, druid/druidcraft and general pagan paths where most seem happy to accept that people don't all believe the same thing.

I don't think you have to define yourself.

I believe in spirit but I don't follow any particular religion. They're all a bit, do this do that and you'll be saved, which doesn't really appeal!

I see a lovely lady for reiki sessions. She's a bit of spiritual mentor and has opened my mind beyond belief. I'll be honest, I don't really know what I am and I don't really care. I don't discuss my beliefs with other people. I do know, however, that when my Dad died earlier in the year I coped a lot better knowing his spirit was still around than I would have done in my previously unbelieving state.

Take a trip to the library and start reading. Whatever resonates will be the right choice for you.