Church after baby

[Mouseymum]

Hi all,

Anyone else found attending church a bit disappointing once baby comes along? I have quit the choir, so now feel jealous when they process, sing the anthem etc, and I spend half the service changing baby/wondering whether I have enough time to feed baby before the Peace. Plus now I'm not in the choir, I sit at the back of the congregation. It all feels very small from this angle, not nearly as impressive as when sitting up the front. Basically,what was a highlight of my week, has now become a damp squib. :-(

Mouseymum becoming a mother is such a major transition that can change almost every aspect of your life, it's no surprise that you are having a different experience of church. I don't know what denomination or church community you belong to but can you find new ways to be connected to or minister to other church members? Is there any kind of group for new parents? Or can you be a reader in church while someone holds the baby for example. The church exists to evangelise so we should bring the love of Christ to the situation Jesus has placed us in. Be a loving mother and a caring friend, look around you for ways to spread love. It may be a while before you are back in the choir as that is not God's path for you at the moment. Change involves loss but also new opportunities, ask Jesus to show you what those are. I'll keep you in my prayers - I know it can be frustrating at this season in your life x

It'll get easier in time and you will get back to the choir if you want to. Is there a crèche or could you speak to a few other parents and set one up? Would your partner be able to look after the baby sometimes so that you can sing with the choir, or concentrate on the service? Would a bible study or prayer group during the week be a possibility? Sorry for all of the questions. I have been in your position and found that some of these really did help a huge amount.

I had my son four weeks ago and have found church challenging just because it has changed so much. My church has a feeding room sett up where you can hear the service if you need to change/feed in privacy which is great but does get a bit lonely.

I am trying to see it as a way to grow in my faith. I think that I was perhaps putting too much emphasis on the wrong parts if church and this has really made me think that actually I need to focus on his word and worshiping him.

It is still early days. I just wanted to let you know that you aren't the only one struggling.

It does get better. Now my dd is old enough to get involved a bit in children's services (she's two), that's giving me a whole new angle.
I sometimes leave her with dh and go on my own to an adult service, as I need that sometimes too!

Thanks all for your replies :-)
Had another tough Sunday missing half the service to change nappy/feed. Coffee afterwards cheered me up a bit though, as everyone loves her. I have taken her to a short midweek service which was a bit better, as it was over quicker!

It is so lovely, I think, to have your child grow up as part of your church community. My dd has been attending church since she was about a week old, and at 2 now she has had her good spells in church and her less good ones, but everybody loves her because they know her.
And she just loves being in churches! I'm a bit obsessed with little village churches too, love going to see them, and she shares my joy in this because I just think we both feel so comfortable and at peace there.
Honestly, the frustrations you are going through now in terms of distraction during services will resolve into something really special - it just takes time.

Thanks Ldf :-)

Tbh, I'd just feed your baby in church. I didn't with my first, was a bit nervous about doing it with my second and did it when necessary with my third. No one has ever said anything to me about it. Also, unless your baby absolutely needs changed I'd probably leave that until after the service as well if you felt you'd be missing out.