I'd like to ask a serious question about my guinea pig's arse.

[Boco]

Which is ironic because when Thready's GPig died I wrote a poem about fecal impaction - and now I think my guinea pig may have just that. He's not been pooing much and the area around his bum is bulging in a very alarming way.

Has anyone experienced this,(not personally of course, just in their guinea pigs) and do you know what to do about it? I don't want him to explode or anything. And I don't really want to be doign things to his bum either. Is there a solution?

Thready's conscience was hard-smitten
By the poem that you'd written,
When you said her piggy died
Because she never even tried

To force reluctant poos outside.

Now strange fate has brought you here
With your own impaction fear.
Although so quick poor Thread to chide,
You too need a bum-squeeze guide.

Let this make check on sinful pride.

You're right. You are. From this day forth, I will NEVER write pet death related poetry. That's it for me.

But if I say sorry, will someone tell me what to do with Wilfred's bulging bottom?

Sorry not to be more helpful.

I think I may have deserved it.

Wilfred's bottom is your nemesis.

But (feeling guilty now), trying to be helpful: Perhaps you could massage some olive oil into the affected part. The combo of oil and massage might well help, and can't harm. (threadie here, btw.)

Ha! I had a feeling it was you, you sly fox.

Hmm. That might work. I really should try shouldn't I. Aibu at being a bit squeamish about poking around the guinea pig's bulging anus? Maybe if it's not resolved by this afternoon I'll give it a go.

sounds like my hamster (RIP)

took to vet as smelled of wee and had hard lump around tummy/bum

vet said he had a tumour, was given antibs and told to come back 10days later

but Timmy died 3days later

take Wilfred to the vet

Poor Timmy.

Have you tried the massage yet Boco? It will be quality time and soothing for both of you (it's a sought-after treatment at the Spa Angst).

Also, is he getting his 10/10?

i mis spelt - J not T - JIMMY!!!!!

but thank you!!

from my 'diseases of domestic g-pigs' book...

"Petroleum jelly or olive oil can be smeared iinside the anus and the mass of faeces can be squeezed out manually. Once this condition develops in a boar he will need to be cleared out on a weekly basis. If the boar is not redigesting any caecel (???) faeces he may also require supplementation with a vit B complex".

Off you go to start squeezing, just make sure its organic extra virgin ok , nothing but the best.

Cambridge Cavy Trust could sort him out if you can get there.

Oh goodness.

Sorry about Jimmy

So it looks like there's no way around this. I'm going in...[whimper]

Guvk your new name makes me anxious, i don't know why but whenever I see it it reminds me of my tax return.

I know, it is unintentionally bureaucratic. I should change it -- it was just a random thump on the keyboard with my stubby fingers on re-registering.

I might become Threadworm666 or some such.

Good luck with the expedition into Wilfred. Leave a trail of breadcrumbs so you can find your way out again -- and let us know how it goes.

You probably didn't really want an update on Wilfred's bottom, but I've given it a try. It's not as easy as you'd think. If you poke the bulge, it just bulges somewhere else, I couldn't get anything to come out of actual bum hole, I just made him wriggle and make uncomfortable squeaks, and I felt like a bit of a pervert with the oil and the prodding and the massaging. Dp came outside while I was doing it and helpfully said 'I'm not sure I can feel the same way about you ever again'.

So, if anyone has ever tried to milk a guinea pig in this way, I'd be grateful for tips because all I've done is embarrass us all.

would lettuce make him looser

love the name wilfred btw

The thought of inserting anything into a gp's bottom makes me want to heave!

Could it be a hernia?

Id take him to the vet and let him/her find out

Oh I didn't put anything actually in his bottom, I just sort of tried to massage the big bump around it to make the poo come out.

Anyway it didn't work, so you're right, next stop vet. I tried cucumber as thought that might help. (in rehydration terms, not insertion)

thank god boco

about the exact wehreabouts you are putting the cucumber that was

I just read the bit meglet quoted - argh who would have the guts to do that

Reminds me of when my friends wind me up with gory detail of dealing with cleaning a horses willy - I really dont want to know!!!

This is strangely reminding me of the South Park Lemmiwinks episode.....

Guinea Pig's arse, poor thing
Full of poo that should not be
Woe for Boco

HAIKU CHALLENGE

lol at your DP's dismay boco. You'd think that he would be able to invent some sort of patent guinea pig evacuactor -- how about vapourized Marmite in the form of an enema?

A haiku

Alas Boco, olive oil massage
To release guinea pig poo
Wilf's only hope.

LOL at the Haikus

Gosh a marmite enema, there's an idea. Dp STILL not heard back from unilever - can you even believe it.