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Original poster

OH has now said I cant have a kitten.......

19 replies

npg1 · 21/05/2009 19:46

As many of you know I have posted a few topics on kittens.

Last weekend OH said what i presumed as a yes to a cat. He wanted a bald cat but I said no I want a fluffy one and it was left like that. Kids in the car presuming we were getting one.

So I did my homework and found and reserved a kitten for 4 weeks time.

OH works away all week mon- fri and is hardly here anyway and I want a cat to keep me company. we just had a barney over the phone as he is now saying no! They will mess up furniture and smell the house out and leave loads of hairs everywhere?!

I said it wont smell, I do the housework, the house is always tidy and clean and I wouldnt let a cat mess it up! AND he is never here.

Feel fed up now, do I keep pushing for the cat? He always does what he wants so why should I obey him?!

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 21/05/2009 19:50

hmm you shouldn't have to "obey" him. but it'd be nice if you could both come to a decision on it.

tbh if it were me i would probably do the selfish thing and just get one because as you say he isn't there all week anbd you'll be the one looking after it.

TheProfiteroleThief · 21/05/2009 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

noddyholder · 21/05/2009 19:52

Why is it up to him?

Original poster
npg1 · 21/05/2009 19:53

No but I always obey him! (sorry!) I would be too scared to just get one.

The cat wont be allowed upstairs, will sleep in kitchen during night (my preference anyway!) plus the big thing that gets me is he is never here so why should I not get one?

OP posts:
Original poster
npg1 · 21/05/2009 19:54

x posted! its not up to him I guess but I ask permission ALL the time

OP posts:
ProstetnicVogonJeltz · 21/05/2009 19:54

Get it anyway then when he notices act surprised and say 'I told you I was getting it'

Original poster
npg1 · 21/05/2009 19:55

He doesnt ask my permission/ opinion when he buys a new car or car parts!

OP posts:
catinthehat2 · 21/05/2009 20:06

Would you be worried for the cat's safety - would he be nasty to it if you just got one? If so, don't get one.

Original poster
npg1 · 21/05/2009 20:13

no, not at all, dont need to worry about that!

OP posts:
MoominMymbleandMy · 21/05/2009 20:18

Oh dear, poor you. I wouldn't have gone out with a man who didn't like cats, but it's a bit too late now.

Could you get the children onside?

Dreamaway · 22/05/2009 11:17

My DH was a bit like this, although i didn't have to ask his permission but wanted some sort of approval. He initially said no way!!
It's a man thing they like to think they are in control and put thier foot down.

He also tried the and messing up the house and furniture excuse but the truth is, all cat care is done by me and always kept clean and furniture already scratched, so didn't have an argument.

Like your DH mine is away alot so i wanted company. I think my DH realised i was going to get another kitty no matter what, but i had to make him think it was his decision.

The Result,, It has taken me over half an hour to get this far in the post as i have a 7 week old kitten hanging from my arm and allover the laptop!!!! And DH absolutely loves the new addition, He never batted an eyelid about having an emergancy visit to the vet yesterday and forking out £50 (he really is a big softie)

If Your DH absolutely hates cats then i would not go ahead, he may resent it and you for getting it.
On the other hand he may completely change his opinion once you have a kitten and totally accept it and realise they are not so bad. Only you know your DH but if he is away all week then i don't see how it will affect him. I think personally you should make the decision this time

ClaireDeLoon · 22/05/2009 11:22

Leave him.

More seriously I would explain (face to face not over the phone) that you want this and you don't understand why he is saying no, as the mess won't be a problem. It should be a joint decision as it's quite a committment - cats often live to late teens now.

Dreamaway · 22/05/2009 11:22

Forgot to add we already have three cats, And Dh said that was enough....the truth is no matter how many you have it will never be enough !!!!

RumourOfAHurricane · 22/05/2009 11:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

bella39 · 22/05/2009 12:07

Agree with shineoncrazy diamond totally. Your relationship doesn't sound very healthy.

Jux · 22/05/2009 12:41

We have 2 cats (one's pg so we'll have more soon!). The house doesn't smell, there's only fur everywhere if we don't hoover, the furniture's scratched anyway, and they prefer to scratch outside.

Get one.

jumpingbeans · 22/05/2009 12:43

Red Rag to a bull, I would have gone and 10 bloody cats/kittens

junglist1 · 22/05/2009 12:45

Keep on and on, dear. And on and on some more. OR ask him while he's watching footie. Mmn means yes!

CountryGirl2007 · 30/05/2009 01:06

just get one. who made him the boss anyway?! you're entitiled to a pet if you want one, stuff him.

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