Today I am pleased to announce that I am running for the position of Easter Bunny 2019 in the UK. My platform is one of pan-species inclusiveness and, if elected, I will Make Easter Great Again. My campaign seeks to disrupt the traditional, species-ist norms of the role and replace the two-term incumbent Easter Bunny, Bugsy O’Hare. I plan to listen to the dissatisfied UK voters and offer something completely new - light years away from the broken promises and complacency of career politician Mr. O’Hare, who has aided and abetted Easter’s descent into shameless consumerism and gluttony, controlled by the rabbit elite.
Yours truly,
Petal the Shih Tzu