Reception birthday parties: what to do when can’t invite everyone?

[Peachpavlova]

My daughter is about to start reception with her birthday coming up in September. She went to the school nursery with about 21 children in her class. When starting reception there will be about 45 kids. I have booked a party where 30 children are allowed to attend but now I am worrying about the fact obviously not all children can attend. Do I send invites to everyone and hope some don’t turn up? My plan was to invite 5 of her cousins and about 18 from her school class that I know she plays with and knows well. I don’t want to seem rude or upset any children!

Do you think better to cut the number down a little from 18 and she just invites her friends? Or maybe she could just invite the girls? If not, i dont even think its bad as its not like you'd just be leaving 1 or 2 out.

That sounds like alot of children, won't they be split over two classes? If so I would invite the DC in her class.

I could definitely cut numbers down, lots of kids in the nursery have had parties in the same place and theres definitely a lot of the nursery lot that have never turned up to the parties so I’m assuming that will also happen here.

Off topic , but I’ve never heard of a class that has 45 children 😳

there is 2 teachers but they are in the same room still and apparently mix through the day which doesn’t help! Maybe I should try whittle it down to the 10 she wants plus cousins?

Surely that is 45 in 2 classes in reception ?

Miss out the cousins, you can have a family birthday at home. Invite all the girls in her actual class.

What about inviting all of the girls? With a class that size I am sure it will be common for only some DC to be invited as many party places are limited to 30 DC.

I'd only book the kind of party where everyone can come, at this stage. Doesn't have to be expensive. You can hire a hall/go to a YM or something and do most of the stuff yourself.
Of course it's your choice, there's no obligation to have a party at all, but as you're asking, there are some parents who will go on about it for ever and be very petty if their kids isn't invited. This dies down after the first year in my experience though.

45 children in 1 class!!!! That’s ridiculously high I thought ks1 had to have under 30? anyway that’s not your question, I think as long as you invite less than half so 20 or less it’s fine and nobody will be bothered! You could always do just girls or just boys if you’re struggling??

Yes 2 teachers but one class room where they all still mix together which is a bit odd imo.

I’ve already booked it now and didn’t really think anything of it as I just knew others had booked the same thing in nursery and everyone enjoyed it but I never took into consideration the jump in size of the class. 🙈I will keep it to just the girls as less likely for any fall out that way I think

I’ve never heard of that before, won’t it be so loud with that many children in one area? For the party, just go with the 18 friends she plays with. No one wants to go to a party of 45 children anyway!

I was shocked when I visited as I assumed there would be a partition or something but there isn’t.

Just invite the girls

This was the exact set up DS had at school for Reception (you’re not in West London are you?). There’s one big room but the group was split into two, each with its own teacher and TA so it was, in effect, like being in a Reception class of 22ish. If it’s a similar arrangement, you could just invite the half class that your DC is in. That was one way parents did parties when DS was that age.

We are SE London but that is exactly how they are set up. Feel a bit sorry for her as her two little best friends have got a different teacher to her haha! Did your school continue throughout the school with 2 teachers? I never actually asked that question.

I wouldn’t worry too much on the friendship point - they play a lot across the classes. DS best friend in reception was in the ‘other half’ and it didn’t matter at all.

At our school, they have three classes across KS1 - a Year 1 class, a mixed Year 1/2 class and a Year 2 class. In Year 1, the oldest third of them go into the mixed class with the youngest third of Year 2. DS is an August baby so he was in the Year 1 class in Year 1 and then the mixed class in Year 2. At the moment, Year 3 onwards are taught as one big class because there’s a fair amount of movement and the school isn’t at capacity in the later years. It’s filling up a lot now so I expect they’ll intro the same concept of three classes across Year 3/4 and across Year 5/6 in due course although potentially based on ability rather than age.

Ugh I hate it when people suggest just invite the girls. Why would you encourage small children to only be friends with children of their own sex? My son was always much closer with the girls in his class and would have been devastated to have been left out because he was a boy. At that age most just love running around and playing. Last time I checked both boys and girls enjoy that.