Upset and bothered.

[JollyRoseSheep]

My husband and i went to our nieces wedding and my husband was giving her away. At the reception we went into the restaurant and the lady seating everyone told us that we were on separate tables. Hubby on top table and I was seated with five other people who I did not know and they all knew each other. I spent a lot of time staring at my plate tried to get my hubbies attention but failed. I really felt walking out and I am still so angry. I am right or wrong.

Sorry but you sound like a bit of an Arsehole if I’m honest, calling the brides mum a cow and then holding a grudge from 59 years ago. So you weren’t sat with you husband- suck it up, deal with it, move on

The bride must have been a canny age was she?

Sorry but the more comments I'm reading from OP, the more I don't believe a word of this.

And what would you have said if you'd been told in advance you were not seated at the top table with your DH?

From your posts here, I suspect you'd have pissed and moaned and had a face like a slapped arse from the moment you found out!

You don't like them. They know that. They kept you in the dark for as long as possible to avoid unpleasant behaviour from you.

In future, have nothing to do with them, save everyone the bother.

I think you need to unpick things here. You clearly didn’t have a nice day, which is a shame - and you’re entitled to feel that it wasn’t enjoyable. But the points you raise are separate. Not being on the top table when your DH is acting as father of the bride (or best man or whatever) is perfectly usual. So that wasn’t rude of them; the problem
was that you didn’t like the people you were sitting with. Could your relatives have known this? Arguably, they must like them if they’re their friends. Fair enough that you didn’t like them (they sound awful) - but you make it sound like “they seated me with awful people” rather than just “I wasn’t keen on the other guests at my table”. And that does sound a bit over dramatic. I’ve been to weddings and been seated with all sorts of people: some have been lovely, some have been awful. But you never have to sit with anyone for that long and it’s all part of life’s rich tapestry. I honestly wouldn’t cause a big family row about it. I’d move on and forget it as far as possible.

it wasn’t rude. it sounds traditional and only bridal party would have been at the top table. i’ve been to a wedding where my husband was best man so he was at the top table and I wasn’t.

Was the bride like 50 or something? Why did she need to be walked down the aisle at all? This is all very odd.

OP, how would you have dealt with the seating plan? Tradition is that the father would sit at the top table, but your dh would have taken that place as he was the one giving your niece away. The brides mother would then presumably sit beside him. Did you think you should be sat there too? .Or did you think he should have sat at the other table with you?

YABU to accept an invitation from people you hate, and then expect to have a good time.

I don’t believe you came across as a non-drinker so I’m astonished that your sobriety was remarked upon.

it’s difficult to know where to sit awkward guests - try not to be the person where people will say “she’ll have a face like a slapped arse and call my mum a cow all day - let’s put her with your cousin who’s on day release for violent affray, and Auntie Linda who will have drunk the litre of vodka she carries in her bag before the soup is out - that way we’ve only spoiled one table”

You are wrong. You are being over sensitive possibly because you know they don't like you very much.

Staring at your plate rather than getting involved and chatting was childish and makes you sound entitled and unlikeable.

For goodness sake! Many people have been in this situation at some stage of their lives, and manage to cope. I think it's time you stopped being "upset and bothered" and learn some social skills so you can converse with others. How were people supposed to include you in their conversations when you sat and stared at your plate!

I thought I was terrible for thinking this 🤣🤣 the bride must be 50 odd.

OP sounds like you were put at the difficult table with the other difficult people.

So a 59 year feud, wow that's a long time. Never mind, just tell her you've picked out a nice outfit for her funeral 😂

Something similar happened to me and I thought the bride was very thoughtless then and so yes I sympathise.
the wedding I went to was in a foreign country In the countryside and the bride got my dh to drive her bridesmaids around between church and hotel and venue and said there would be no room in the car for me either ( and it was our rental car , and I dont have a driving licence …) and then at dinner we were also seperated like you were. if I’d known beforehand I wouldn’t have gone as it felt very rude..
its not normal where I’m from to seperate couples at weddings..

Well, with this attitude, frankly, I’m surprised you got an invite at all. Tbh I think they suffered your presence for the sake of your husband. Every single post you have made has been very nasty about your relatives. The only question I have is how has your marriage lasted so long? Your husband deserves a medal.

😂😂😂

OP, you sound childish, and like you’re looking for drama all the time. Isn’t it exhausting??

I remember when my DH was best man at a wedding and I sat with all the bridesmaids who I didn’t know well at all. Guess what, I made an effort and it was fine. I didnt stare at my plate and make my DH feel bad. It should have been a lovely day giving his niece away and not taken up with you being mardy!

"Never have cared for them and as for brother in law when alive, found so obnoxious in every way."

Why on earth did you go?
(at 82 your husband could have said the drive was too much?)

You say you thought you were "family" so should have been at the top table?

Yet you're calling them all obnoxious and calling the brides mum a "cow".

Sounds like you're a bit of a dick to be honest and no one can be bothered with you. Have you considered that?

Amazed that you're in your 70s. You sound like a self obsessed teenager.

You sound entitled, snobby and boring. Not everything is about you, you know...

You sound unpleasant

You sound unpleasant and miserable. Get over it, the day wasn’t about you. People are dying in the world for fucks sake.

I don’t buy any of this

Sounds like rather a non-issue to me. If DH was giving the bride away then I can see that he would probably be expected to be on the top table.

They should probably have given you some sort of a warning, but really, you are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Many many people have been to a wedding with a bad seating plan. That’s part of adult life. No need to be so sour and “woe is me” about it.

Omg hahaha