Only son moving out - feeling emotional

[queenofthebucket]

that's it really, he's 22 and I have always encouraged him to be independent. He went away to uni and has been back here since graduation last summer. He's now in his second job and is really happy there, and everything is as it should be; he has paid a deposit on a rental flat with his pals so now he's really moving out, and I'm gutted.

Its always been me and him, I'm really going to miss him so much.

Oh OP my only is 8 and I can hardly imagine how you're feeling! Time is already flying. It sounds like you have a great relationship with your son, that is something to be so proud of, and having that bond is what it's all about isn't it? If he is happy to go out and get a job and a place of his own and be independent, then you have done an amazing job. I know that probably isn't much consolation for you today, in this moment, but you should be proud of it anyway. For today, is there something you can do that will distract you a bit - a favourite funny film, a walk in nature, a good book or something you can treat yourself to?

My dear friend is really struggling with this as well.
I'm a mum of 3, married, but I was a single mum with DC1 for many years. He's going on 16 and I'm already having anxiety attacks over this. We have a really special bond.

He'll miss you too! And I imagine he'll be coming home more often than he thinks.
Could you plan a monthly dinner together? There's no solution I can offer really but hugs, big, squeezy
hugs and strength.

Oh bless you

But you have done, and will continue to do, the magnificent job of letting him fly. That's what a good mother does, and you'll find he'll come back to you often, and willingly.

I was an only child, and didn't want to go away to university (not because of my Mum, but because of my boyfriend ) My Mum briskly popped me in the car and took me, sobbing and protesting.

I know now that was probably the hardest thing she ever did, and so so right. I have, despite living abroad for more than 20 years, always had a fantastic relationship with her, gone to visit willingly, spoken on the phone for hours at a time, and njoyed a very very close relationship.

Unlike dp, whose mother is in the next town, but doesn't speak to one of her children because she "left me" (moved to a different area with hr husband and children) and obliges her others to pander to her every whim. We take it in turns to tolerate her.

Be proud you've raised an independent boy.
I am moving away from the dcs next year..both are at university. So this is our last Xmas in our little house ..will be emotional.
But lots of good things ahead.
Like You, I've encouraged independence and confidence.

Thank you everyone for your kind words.
I am immensely proud of him even though we argue and criticise each other. I have to confess I have slept in his bed this weekend because he's been away, and pretended it was because his mattress is better for my back.