I feel that DH is the "good guy" in kids eyes and I'm the "baddie"

[sandyballs]

It always seems to me that disciplines them, stops them eating too many sweets and other crap, tells them when to go to bed, brings them in from the garden for a bath etc etc. I am sure to them it seems like I'm just being mean and Daddy is the fun one who lets them get away with things. Anyone else feel like this?

Yeah, take turns to do the bad stuff. You've got a few on him though, so he can maybe do it all for a day or two!

there is an upside to this - he'll be the one they constantly hassle for stuff and attention. DH is ok food/treat wise and discipline but he pays them a lot of attention - and he constantly goes back on his word: "one more time" he says when they demand to be thrown in the air again. he then proceeds to do it about 5 times and then wonders why they constantly hassle him. he gets no peace ALL weekend.

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Oh, the thing that gets me, is when DH stops DS1 from doing something, by saying "Mum doesn't like it when you do that". Like, er, we both don't like it. Don't make me into the flippin' police!

Sandyballs its exactly the same in our house- despite trying to talk to dh on mmany occasions. he is friend I am foe ! They dont seem to hate me for it though - and some of them are big now. Dh would never discipline them and would let them eat junk etc and stay up late! Its a hard life being Mama!

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I dont mind, the kids at least listen to me and know the score whereas they take the utter piss out of dp as he does change his mind and holler empty threats.

dh's favourite empty threats: we won't take you out on nice days like this again; I will stop playing games like this with you; I won't come home before bedtime; and he wonders why they don't give a flying wot-knot

Children need rules and discipline in order to feel secure, it may not seem like it but they respect you for your rules.

But both parents need to work by the same set of rules, if you figure out how to get your DH to agree on rules, let me know, because mine is no better.

Sorry, did'nt realise I used the word 'rules' so many times in my last post.