Potty-training regression - what's going on in his head???

[spiker]

DS2 (2.5) came successfully out of nappies over 4 months ago, and he pretty much trained himself, it was all very impressive. He moved from potty to toilet about 2 months ago, again, no problems, and he happily uses strange ones when out and about. It all seemed sorted and well established (there's a BUT coming...)

BUT...about 4 weeks ago he started wetting at home a bit. Then a lot. Then the odd soiling incident too. Then when we're out. But NEVER at nursery and NEVER if out with another adult without a parent - this only happens when he is with one/both parents (and DS1, come to think of it).

It's really sad. He was so proud of himself before. And we are going mad with the endless cleaning.

What could be going on in his little head? He seems to care not a jot.

And what the hell should I do???

bump...

The mentality behind whether or not to use the toilet or stay in the pants for a toddler is a minefield! DS who is 3.4 has been dry for about 2 months now, but always soils...we've tried star charts and prizes which haven't worked, but the bottom (sorry) line is he just doesn't want to do it!
aaaaarahhggg
(went camping this weekend, and had to throw some pants out, as couldn't cope with the thought of bagging and bringing home!).

Thank you both for posting. No, no life changes here. Don't think he has UTI (DS1 had one once, I see no such symptoms). He has been getting lots of praise for when he does make it to the toilet it these days. Some of it I think is genuine accidents, eg when he's tired, but a lot of the time it seems to be a very deliberate act. I've gone from not making a big deal out of it to being really cross with him. It gets a bit much when I have to clean the floor/carpet/bed for the 7th time that day, DH is going spare about it...then DS2 spends next day at nursery and he is fine!

I moved onto stickers today, put them on him though not a chart, he doesn't get charts. Wondering if I should revert to having a potty downstairs and take his trousers/pants off at home, make it very easy for him again.

Excuse ignorance, what is CPN? Something paediatric nurse??

ah...no I know nothing about mental health...although I do work for NHS, but in informatics, I feel I should have known what a CPN was though.

Been OK today, although it was a nursery day, but no floods at home. I am pondering the praise comments and having a think about my tactics. He is pleased to be given a sticker.

Ruthyn - yes, buy them cheap and chuck them! life is too short to spend it washing pooey pants.

spiker, my ds3 started wee-ing on the stairs!!!! recently and we figured it was simply for attention! There is a 6 year gap between ds2 and ds3 so he was very much the "baby" until I recently had ds4. I think he figured that even negative attention was better than no attention! So I just stopped making a fuss and stopped commenting and we're happily back to using the toilet again!
(BTW as a cloth nappy user, a poo-ey nappy down the toilet was a regular occurence for us anyway, so poo-ey pants don't seem so bad now!)

In case anybody looks in again, I'm happy to say that all is back on track. After a spectacular flood about 5 days ago I tried a different tack, saying how it made mummy sad, but doing it in the toilet made mummy happy (with crazed grin!). Something clicked and that was pretty much that.

So there probably was some psychological family-praise thing going on, although have not quite figured it out, am just happy we seem to have moved on.

Thank you all for the support!

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