Does parenting get less expensive or more expensive?

[SwizzlesTwizzles]

I'm wondering about our future trajectory! Life got a lot cheaper when my 8 year old left nursery and since then the only things that have gotten more expensive are the amount of food she eats, the fact that we have to pay for school dinners now she's in year 3, and she's signed up to a couple of expensive hobbies. But generally she's much cheaper now than she was as a toddler.
I have a 2 year old as well and I'm looking forward to the end of nursery fees as something that will give us more financial wiggle room, but I'm feeling a sense of foreboding that I'm wrong about that.
Is there stuff that gets more expensive later on besides general uptick of groceries consumed?

Yes. Everything is more expensive.

Nursery costs exceed my (fairly big) mortgage

I have 5 kids; in my experience, the older they are, the more expensive it is.

Ours finished uni in 2021. They were eligible for the minimum loan which about £1200 per term. We paid the fees and their rent. Rent was between £5k and £7k pa I think (DH paid it). I gave them the equiv of the min loan for their ex's. (They were v lucky).

In 2013, DS's school fees and associated expenses came to about £21k. Uni was a shade less all in. Uni was 6 - 8 hours of contact time. School was about 24 plus sport and exceptional pastoral care. School was better value.

Nursery fees are expensive but once they are over, I would advise putting aside a sum for when they are older, secondary and upwards.

Spending at that age has an element of discretion but money buys choices and options when it makes a difference, such as tuition, private school if needed (same cost as nursery), , expensive sports, driving lessons, no need to take holiday jobs in uni, house deposits. We paid for ds' cram school lessons for A levels, private ADHD diagnosis, powerful computer for his course.

For holidays, once they got older, they would each get their own hotel room because dcs are a boy and a girl. Not essential but it does add to the costs.

Dd will be on packed lunches as soon as she goes into year 3. I'm not paying nearly £4 a day for a ham roll and spoon of peas.... Or half a jacket potato and a spoon of beans!

I can give her decent lunches for £4 a week!

Babies cheap (cloth nappies and breastfed so basically free)
toddlers expensive (nursery)
primary cheap
secondary I am anticipating expensive as they want all the tech, driving lessons, branded clothes etc.

Peaks and troughs.
But DC are expensive no matter what their age!
Baibes are expensive particularly your first when you have to buy everything from scratch.
Then theres nursery, followed by lots of clubs and activities, swimming lessons etc.
I had a brief period of thinking it was getting cheaper late primary when they decided to give up a lot of clubs/hobbies but then they needed bus passes to secondary school, adult clothing , charged adult admission prices, mobile phone contracts, laptop etc
Followed by driving lessons, car insurance, uni and weve just got to house deposit stage.
So im not sure yet when it does get cheaper😄

I was fortunate that my DS only went twice a week. He is 11 now but school fees have kicked in!

I have two DDs 18 & 16 and I can honestly say that I’ve never considered the cost of them 😂 DCs are just expensive period! I do not know if they were any cheaper as toddlers or as teens … I don’t buy nappies, wipes, Clarkes shoes and new clothes every five minutes because they’ve grown. But back then I wasn’t being tapped up for concert tickets, Rhode blushers and Robux 🤷🏼‍♀️

Three kids currently age 17, 20 and 22. They definitely got more expensive from 12 ish onwards. Outings with friends, lots of outfits (no uniforms here), smart phones, laptops, gaming pcs, endlessly replacing headphones, allowance for 17 year old is just $100 a month and 20 year old gets $200 and that’s all we pay while he is in community college (he lives at his girlfriends house so I should really pay more but we are poor) and oldest lives at home but works so doesn’t get allowance but we still have to pay for stuff sometimes.

Xmas is where it really gets expensive. In the past we’ve done things like smart phone upgrades but that costs us monthly $384 just for their three phones and line rentals.

Mine are 24 and 22, current period has been most expensive, university, post grad, driving lessons, help with cars etc. They both on the whole funded themselves through uni with part time jobs but needed help with post grad fees and both lived at home while doing their MSc, DS in process of doing his now and has required more help than DD.

Generally the loans don’t cover accomodation. And what happens if you then can’t get a part time job? I know people whose accomodation is £8k more than their loan per year… and that’s before food, books, transport.

Parents are expected to contribute by the government.

More expensive as they get older here.
Clothes (adult sizes and not happy with a wardrobe of 100% hand-me-downs as they had when little)
Food - i do a huge weekly shop and have to top up on basics like bread, butter etc
Activities- they are good for kids, keep them focused and off devices but they are expensive
Days out - eating out vs a couple of packs of breadsticks etc.
Transport. Leap (transport) card for oldest, bike for younger so can cycle to friends. Kids bikes are cheap, the bigger the bike the bigger the price
Shoes - need various types for school, Activities, messing about, etc. Get worn out quickly and soooo expensive to replace
Phone - my 12yr old got a phone for Christmas before starting 2nd level school - i pay 10 a month. Phone was free (my upgrade... but i now have no free upgrade in the cupboard for if mine breaks)
Birthdays etc... they just want to do more expensive things and i want them to have occasional treats
Pocket money - i started this to encourage doing jobs around home and when eldest started going to local shop with friends.... i didn't want her to be there with no money, didn't want to give some every time because she needs to learn ro save etc, and if has no money I would fear they might be tempted to shoplift (not oldest DD though, stickler for rules)
School costs increase - uniform dearer in 2nd level, need tech etc.

3 kids, I work part time but am going back full time next year as can't keep up with the expenses any more.

With our three-year-old, I would say the costs just change shape rather than disappear. My wife and I are not at the school dinners or big hobbies stage yet, but food, clothes and shoes already add up because things get outgrown so fast. What has helped us is keeping the regular spending as simple as we can and trying to put a little aside when there is a quieter month, because having dealt with credit and debt stuff in the past, I know a sudden bigger bill is much harder when there is no buffer at all. I am not counting on it getting cheaper, just hoping the expensive bits spread out a bit more as they get older.

I've just paid £25 for a ticket to watch 20 year old dc1 playing the piano. In primary school it was free!

Just wondering those of you paying 10k a year for student accommodation, are your dc in expensive areas or are they in some kind of luxury student flat? Just curious as dc2 pays around £6k a year for his accommodation in Buckinghamshire which I thought was a fairly expensive area.

Just looked it up and dc1 pays 6.5k a year in Liverpool. He could spend up to 10.5k but for that he would get a gold studio flat which looks huge and includes your own cooking and living area and quite a big shower room too. Dc2 has an en suite but it's tiny, like a cupboard with a toilet and shower.

It depends which city they are in. £6k is very cheap for student accommodation.

DD didn't even consider any London universities because accommodation costs were so prohibitive.

DD currently pays £6,600 in Liverpool.

My ds1 is in Liverpool too. I've just been on the website for his student accommodation and he pays about the same amount as your DD. He is in the cheapest room available though (standard size silver not ensuite). Some of the options are very nice but eye wateringly expensive. Dc2 has an en suite but I've seen airing cupboards bigger. It's fine for just him though.

For me I'd say it's got more expensive but I didn't have expensive childcare fees when they were little so that must be a massive help when they stop.

When they were young we went to the park, for walks and free or very cheap activities at the local children's centre. They were easily pleased with things like a Hot Wheels car or a toy from a charity shop. I could get them massive sets of Paw Patrol toys or whatever from Ebay and they didn't know or care where it came from.

As teenagers they eat a lot more, they ask for smart phones and expensive clothes for Christmas, money to go out with friends, just going to McDonalds costs a fortune now they've gone from Happy meals to Big Macs!
They are in football teams so there's all the subs to pay for and petrol to drive them all over for matches.

I am really lucky though that if they need any new clothes or coat or something and I haven't got a lot I've got them what they need from Vinted and they are happy with that. They understand and don't moan that they're not new.
My 15yr old has also got a job a few months ago and works really hard at weekends and in the school holidays so has started using her own money to go shopping and go out with her mates and thats a big help.

Isn't it a bit late now?

When they are adults it's as expensive as you want it to be and have the means for.

DS's university accommodation costs more than twice his maintenance loan. He is only at a Northern university, not in London.
There are no jobs to be had. He only drinks water and didn't join societies to save money.

University accommodation is catered ensuite, but we had no choice. This is what DS had been allocated. No catering at weekends.
It is not a new student flat, it is basically a shared house. Old-fashioned uni accommodation.
It is in the North.
Room is awful. I can't believe we pay over £10K for it.

Everyone always says that 18 year olds should get the cheapest uni accommodation and a PT job. They can't.

There is also a certain naivety that families have been able to squirrel away at least £60k per child to fund 3 years at university. Back in the real world....