Is TV and phone use around my 9 week old a problem?

[Newbornsquareeyes]

I'm a first time mum to an admittedly very precious first born and I'd appreciate some advice and opinions.

Baby is 9 weeks old.

I'm exclusively breastfeeding and so far have been watching some telly during the day whilst I feed (binge watching box sets) and scrolling on my phone at night/reading my kindle whilst feeding at night. I've tried to differentiate day and night, so we stay in the bedroom overnight.

With husband in the scarce evenings we've had together weve been watching sport- mainly the world Cup and commonwealth games. Coincidentally, the downstairs changing station is in front of the TV and little one appears to be noticing the TV and staring at it.

Is this a problem? Do I need to stop it? If I don't, at what age should I stop it?

I know the guidance is no screen time at all, but I have no worries that the baby is missing out on language development opportunities/age appropriate playtime - we have that in abundance. We're out for a walk each day whatever the weather. I won't be giving them a smartphone or an IPad when they're older, and I'm absolutely not plonking them in front of a YouTube video/TV programme to keep them entertained.

I'm just starting to worry that the TV & phone is a problem and I shouldn't be doing it. Especially as baby is not a great sleeper. Please help!!

Sounds perfectly fine. You need to keep your sanity too!

Baby is just attracted to the moving lights/sounds.

However now is a good time to decide what you want to model as your baby gets older in terms of screens.

Also - looking at your phone can give you a blank, unresponsive face - look up the Still Face Experiment and how babies respond when their caregiver does not show any emotion or expression. Your phone is probably a lifeline at the moment, so I'm not trying to shame you into never using it! Just to encourage mindful use.

DS was born just as Love Island started and our morning routine for weeks was moving to the lounge and feeding while I caught up on the villa shenanigans (and often Aftersun shenanigans too). For the rest of the day I’d have podcasts or the radio on, in the evening we might have TV on again while he was feeding.

He’s now just two, bright as a button, speaking in full coherent sentences and has the concentration and patience to sit though (often multiple) whole stories when we read to him, or to watch the 25 minute ish Julia Donaldson animations on a wet afternoon, sitting with us and discussing what we’re watching, pointing out characters he knows, reciting bits he remembers.

I don’t think some background TV when he was tiny did him any harm, and it definitely kept me sane!

I spent most of the night feeds binge watching various crappy detective series. Doesn’t seem to have done mine any harm.

I'd completely forgotten till I read this that I used to binge watch Traffic Cops with DD2's night feeds. (And I am a parent who is pretty strict about screentime!)

As long as you're having plenty of good interactions with them all the rest of the time, I don't think watching the odd thing while you're feeding a very young baby is the kind of screentime you need to worry about.

You sound like you are a very thoughtful parent and it sounds like you're doing a brilliant job! Enjoy some tv time before baby gets old enough to want to watch it themselves!

This in spades!!! Make the most of these days. Soon you’ll be watching episodes of “Bing” or “Peppa pig” 😂

Thank you so much everyone, this has really reassured me!!

Definitely had lots of background TV when I was feeding my youngest! He’s 2.5 now, nursery constantly telling me he’s exceptionally bright, a chatterbox who loves reading, music and sports. Did him absolutely no harm and the rest of my days with him as a baby were spent talking to him, playing with him and singing to him. No regrets about the background TV, in fact it was one of my favourite parts of the day 😀

You're doing fine OP

DD spent her first 12 weeks or so listening to/watching old episodes of The Bill, and for DS it was every UK episode of Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares. Doesn't seem to have done either of them any harm!

As long as you are doing other things during the day in her wake windows like picture cards, singing face to face etc so she’s getting stimulation and interaction you’re absolutely fine.

It’s not as if your daughter is put in a corner and never has interaction.

My 16 week old has been subject to real housewives of various kinds 🤣

You’re doing great, enjoy your shows :)

I still cannot fathom how our parents survived this stage of parenthood without smartphones!

Make the most of it. I miss the days when we could watch TV with the baby there. It will all end very soon, around 6-9 months when they're trying to watch it tio.

DS is 2 and the only times we can watch anything we want, is when we are way way too tired to enjoy it.

I miss Netflix.

Sounds absolutely fine! I watched so much netflix the first few months whilst breastfeeding and contact napping. I wish I'd continued to watch my own programmes around my DS tbh as he's almost 4 and would kick off if I put anything on for myself. We didn't ever want to ignore him to watch our programmes so it's always been kids tv while he's awake :/

Mine had ‘watched’ a lot of time team reruns, most of peep show and at least five series of House before i stopped night feeds. Seem to be turning out ok 😁

@Newbornsquareeyes you and your baby will be just fine - enjoy those sleepy cuddles and tv shows!

Yes, there’s guidance around screen time, but there’s also sleep deprivation, anxiety and just getting through those first few months. I found as mine got older, I used cartoons just so I could make dinner or grabbed a quick shower. Sometimes it’s just about getting through the day.

If having the TV on, reading your Kindle or scrolling your phone helps you get through those feeds then don’t feel guilty about it.

Your baby is only 9 weeks old. They’re loved, fed and cuddled, and you’re clearly a mum who cares. Be kind to yourself too. ❤️

when my first baby was 9 weeks old it was 5 years since 9/11 and i remember spending hours watching 9/11 documentaries while she fed/dozed on me and she has turned out fine! as others have said before you know it the tv will be dominated by cbeebies etc. i did also read a lot in the early weeks as mine were all velcro babies but this was pre i phones and when they were feeding or napping.

I’m just hanging onto the hope that my baby has seen so many murder documentaries that they’ll grow up to be a superb police officer 🤣