Returning to work with EBF baby who refuses bottle or cup

[RareOpalSnake]

Hi Mumsnetters,

I’m due to return to work end of August but at the moment my DD (7 months) won’t take a bottle or drink from a cup.

We’ve started solids, it’s slow but I’m pleased with how she’s getting on so far.

i’m worrying something rotten about going back to work and DD suddenly having an abrupt change in her daily routine (she’s EBF and generally cries when not with me).

Any advice or tips on how I can ensure the RTW isn’t so harsh on her? I hate the thought of her crying for me and I’m not around!

thank you

A question: where are you when she is offered a bottle or cup? I hope the experience of my DD may help allay your fears. She was EBF. Others had offered her a bottle (BM) which she accepted when I wasn't anywhere near. I returned to work when she was seven months and nursery fed her BM from a bottle with no reported problems.

So she'll be 10 months when you return to work? Mine was very similar at 7 months but was barely eating, took months to really eat anything. I would suggest you start now leaving her with someone else for short periods, and build it up. You might find she is more receptive to a bottle or cup from someone else. Have you tried a straw cup and use the pipette method to teach straw use?Honestly mine would go most of the day at nursery without eating much or drinking much milk when she first started, just was desperate to BF when I got her. But after a month or so she started eating more, and we switched to giving her cows milk to drink whilst away from me. It is a hard transition and there is a limit to what you can do to help it but leaving her a bit more, gradually, might help you both.

My third was an EBF baby who refused a bottle or cup and was 9 months old when I returned to work

He took a bottle from his childminder within an hour of me leaving him with her and went to sleep on her chest (she took a selfie and sent it to me and ai cried with relief)

I’ve gone out when we’ve tried her on a bottle - but no luck. We’ve tried BM and formula. She scream cries until I return at the moment.

Oh my god this would be the dream right? I so hope this happens for us!

This must be distressing for your DD, you and the person trying to feed her. Could you try different teats?

Both mine were EBF for 14 months and never had a bottle.

By ten months you should be able to feed them three times a day, first thing, the second you get home (bliss!) then last thing at night. They will be getting most of their calories from food by then won’t they?

DS was the same when I went back to work although he was nearer 12 months. Never took milk from a bottle, or cup, just refused.

i used to bf him when he first woke up before i went to work, then as soon as i got home, so teatime ish, then just before his bedtime. I think by that time he wasn’t feeding overnight or only the occasional one if he hadn’t fed enough at bedtime.

During the day he’d have porridge with milk for breakfast, and water from a cup to keep him hydrated.

I was really worried beforehand but he was absolutely fine.

There’s a big difference between 7 months and 10 months, a lot can and will likely change between now and the end of August. Neither of my EBF babies ever had milk that wasn’t from me, they had water in a cup from 6 months (the tommee tippee free flow ones are easiest) and when I went back to work at 10 and 12 months respectively they both carried on having boob with me and water and food when they weren’t with me. By that age baby will be fine without milk while you’re at work, but do keep offering cups of water so get used to that. If they don’t want milk in a cup or bottle don’t worry about it.

This is what I did too. A bit of water if hot weather

I dropped day time feeds when DS was five and a half months in preparation for going back to work a month later (this was the norm 20 years ago). Probably not what you want to hear but he never took a bottle or a cup; we owned every single teat and cup on the market. Even at nursery, he never took one. He lived on two feeds a day and a lot of yoghurt/fromage frais. When it got hotter when he was around 10 months, we spooned water into him. I stopped feeding completely at 13 months and he finally worked out a sippy cup. Nursery were very stressed about it but he’s now a strapping 6’2” 23 year old.

DD was 8 months when I stopped BF, she never took a bottle, or milk in a cup. She is now 23, fit and healthy, the only time she has milk is on her cereal or frothed up on a coffee.