Have always had a tea party for my ds's birthdays and we have continued this with dd. Last year for her first we had a lot of people round including her brother's friends (as most of them now have younger siblings the same age as dd). It was a full house and very nice but I don't want to do that scale again - our house isn't big enough for a start.
Ideally I would just like to have a few similar aged children to lunch or tea. But all dd's friends have older brother's who are friends with ds so would like to come too. Two of these are at school with ds but 3 are at nursery, mornings only. I can't have a party for the babies whilst the older ones are at school because the nursery children need picking up around 11.30. So I might as well have one with all the children incl ds (he would really want to be there). This however also means inviting twin girls from his class as they have all been friends for years and I would feel mean if there was a party I didn't invite them too - they are the only ones who don't have younger siblings. But this now makes the list 5 x toddlers and 6 x 4/5 year olds (incl mine). And I only have space for 6 at the table. And I can't do a picnic because the toddlers would run amok over it.
What would you do????