Grammar schools vs independent - Richmond / Woking / Kent

[Firevie]

Hi everyone! I’m looking for some insights. We have been trying to move for a few years now. We live in London but I’ve always wanted to move to the Woking area - bigger house with garddn for the kids etc. my husband was on board but has now gone off the idea and is now dead set on Kent (in particular Orpington). His argument is that there’s grammar schools in Kent / Orpington whereas there are none in Woking. I am not to keen on Kent but if I was to consider it it would have to be Sevenoaks or Tunbridge Wells. If it is about staying in a London Borough, I would rather look at Richmond and surrounding areas eg Teddington, Twickenham, etc. on the whole grammar school debate I am also torn. Of course I would love for my kids to get into grammar schools but I wouldn’t want them to completely give up their childhood and spend every day at private tuition for several years when they should / could be enjoying just being kids. Having said that ideally I would want to move somewhere that has both options ie grammar schools but also independent schools. Apologies for the confusing post. My mind is frazzled at the moment and it feels like we are back to square one when I thought we were settled on an area. Many thanks in advance

what happens if your kids fail the 11+?

@allmyown that is why I would like to live somewhere where there are grammar schools but also independent schools. If my kids don’t get into grammar schools (which is absolutely fine for me btw) they can always go to independent secondary schools.

depends on your house price budget. I used to live in Kingston and lots of good schools around the area. I went to a grammar school not too far away from there. Downside is it’s very expensive to live. I live not too far from Sevenoaks now and still decent selection of grammar schools I would happily send my child too and you get much more house for your money. I don’t know too much about Woking, I know a couple of people who live there and both positives and negatives. What about Guildford? Bit nicer and think there’s a few decent schools there.

I don't believe that the 11+ is integrated into the system in Surrey or other counties whereas it is in Kent, like before (70s) when most of the country went comprehensive.

Yes, you don't have to sit the 11+ in Kent schools but the peer pressure /parental pressure is quite hard in Kent.

In Surrey it's a choice and it's done , I think, on a school by school basis eg entrance exams so your child may have to sit several if they want to get into , say, Tiffins.

In Kent , once the 11+ results come out and you're then allocated an appropriate school, there are many tears and friendship groups change almost overnight where 11+ successors suddenly start to seek out other successors and then choose new friends based on which of the grammars they are going to.

Quite brutal, actually.

a bit late to contribute to this thread but from what I know Orpington as a choice of location for grammar schools is not the best. There are 2 schools there St olaves and newstead and both are super selective. if schools are a priority , then Tunbridge wells would be best as there are both super selective grammars and grammars that accept with a pass.