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Parenting

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Original poster

ds1 has just agreed to 'go out' with a girl in his class. What does this involve for one who's not yet 10?!!

36 replies

Aero · 10/03/2008 16:10

He's in year 5 and will be 10 in a few weeks. He announced on the way home in the car that a weird thing happened in school today. A girl had asked him out, or rather, her friends asked him on her behalf as she was too shy. He's clearly flattered and agreed, although he has no idea what this involves, except that now he has a 'girlfriend'.

Should I be worried? He's definitely at the curious/finding out stage of things (has asked me a few choice questions recently).

What do I say to him? My lovely boy is growing up way too fast for my liking!

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PuppyMonkey · 10/03/2008 16:13

Tee hee. As far as I can make out, the couples that are going out in dd's class (she is Yr 6) don't do ANYTHING. They just say: "Right, we're going out." And that appears to be all that's involved. DD is not impressed at all..

Hulababy · 10/03/2008 16:13

TBH at this age and having herd what you say about the shy girl and your DS, I can't imagine anything will happen as a result. They need to at least talk to each other first, lol Aw, young love is so sweet!

I would imagine all it involves is holding hands and sharing sweets at this stage.

MarsLady · 10/03/2008 16:17

Exactly what PuppyMonkey says. It also means that if there's a school disco they will dance together once, look round in fright then get on with normal daftness with their mates.

Romantic isn't it? lol

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Original poster

Aero · 10/03/2008 16:18

I must admit, I do find it rather sweet. (Also glad someone clearly finds him attractive - I was 15 before anyone asked me out!).

He used the phrase 'in love' to describe 'relationships' between other 'couples' in the class. Cute! Hasn't referred to being in love himself though, but rather thinks they might walk around together. Not sure he's ready for holding hands yet though!

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phlossie · 10/03/2008 16:20

I 'went out' with someone at about this age. I sat on his lap for 30 seconds and then ran away. The relationship only lasted for one playtime!

Scramble · 10/03/2008 16:24

Will still probably play with their own pals and point and giggle accross the playground, might send messages via friends or notes if really brave.

IME anytime they go near each other they are overcome with embarisment (SP?) and will soon decide to fall out and tell each other via friends.

wheresthehamster · 10/03/2008 16:26

It involves nothing afaik. The next you'll hear about it is when he's 'dumped'.

Original poster

Aero · 10/03/2008 17:19

lol! I'll look forward to mending his broken heart!

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princessosyth · 10/03/2008 17:43

Usually it doesn't involve anything. When I was 8 I was asked out by a boy and I turned him down, he misheard and thought I had said yes. For the next 2 years every time I walked past him in the playground he would tell his mates that we "were going out together". After 2 years he sent his mate over to tell me that I was being dumped because he was off to senior school and didn't think we would be able to see each enough to continue with our relationship. I hadn't even spoken to him in the whole 2 year courtship that I hadn't even agreed to!

princessosyth · 10/03/2008 17:44

Oh Aero he sounds so sweet planning on them walking around together. Bless.

MarsLady · 10/03/2008 17:45

PMSL Princess. Better to have loved and lost and all that!

RustyBear · 10/03/2008 18:01

Having it all arranged through friends is quite normal. I remember a mum telling me about her son who was 'going out' with a girl in his class (Y6), but then her best friend told his best friend she didn't want to 'go out' with him any more - but he still did. After a bit of negotiation it was agreed (still through the best friends) that he could still go out with her, but she wouldn't go out with him. Apparently they were both quite happy with this....

Original poster

Aero · 10/03/2008 19:29

rofl Princess. Nothing worse than unrequited love (except perhaps being dumped from a non existant courtship )!

Rusty - he was asked three times by the friends who he'd prefer to go out with and each choice of two girls involved this particular girls name so he's convinced she 'fancies' him! Ain't love grand?!

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Beauregard · 10/03/2008 19:35

Reminds me of when i was at primary school(y2 0r 3) and i had 2 potential 'boyfriends' to choose from.The one boy would leave me love letters in my desk and pick fresh flowers and spend all his tuck money on sweets and leave them in my desk....bless him.
In the end i took the sweets but settled for the 'bad boy' who moved schools the same year,lol.

mumeeee · 10/03/2008 20:47

When DD2 was 11 year 6 she said she was going out with a boy, But they didn't actually go out just talked to esch other at school!

RosaIsRed · 10/03/2008 21:15

DD3 who is only in Year One is already engaged. They walk around the playground holding hands and kissing according to DD1 and her year 6 friends who find this sort of behaviour repulsive and have begged me to put a stop to it.
'When X and I are married,' DD3 told me this weekend, 'we will have a camper van with a bed and a tv and a sofa and we will paint it purple and orange and red stripes and we will drive it to the beach and stay there all summer.'
She also told me that she only wants two children and he wants lots so he will have two with her and two with her best friend. She appears to see no difficulty with this arrangement.

willali · 11/03/2008 13:11

My son is also in Yr 5 and most of his class are "in love" or being "dumped" etc. My son even "gave" his girlfriend to another boy because the other boy said he liked her too... It's all very innocent, with some love notes being exchanged and giggly phone calls if he is feeling brave!

RustyBear · 11/03/2008 19:15

DD got married in the school playground when she was 6 - I think it was inspired by the fact that he had been the inkeeper in the nativity play & she was his wife.

But it all came to a sad end when they wrote books in literacy & he wrote one about My Wedding "A. has long black hair and she is gorgeous. But I don't like it when she sucks her thumb"

DD obviously didn't like boys who kiss and tell and declared that her next book was going to be called 'My Divorce'.....

Original poster

Aero · 11/03/2008 23:08

Soooo cute. Apparantly he played 'it' with her (and several others) today, then just walked round with her a bit. Can't see him holding hands though. Bless him! He wanted me to record this 'mega-event' in his baby book!

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MarsLady · 11/03/2008 23:25

I remember DD1's "engagement". Loved the potential in laws. Still in touch with them now.

But my best memory of this time was picking up from playgroup and hearing them (aged 2) saying "I love you. I marry you someday" whenever they said goodbye.

You know I'm keeping that gem for her wedding day.

milliec · 12/03/2008 06:45

Message withdrawn

2sugars · 12/03/2008 06:47

LOL someone in Y6 asked dd1 (who was then in Y4) if she would go out with him, via a Y6 girl! Needless to say DD said 'Of course not'

bamzooki · 12/03/2008 11:36

DD (10) has been having much angst and fallings out with her friends about a certain boy in her class recently. I asked her the other day what he thought about it all, and she looked at me horrified 'He doesn't KNOW about any of it!!'

Whereas DS (4) in Reception is quite open about having 4 girlfriends, and the other day raided DD's badge-it stock for hearts and flowers badges and took them as presents for all of them.

I'm sure that boys were only for ignoring till I was about 14!
[Shaking head in bemusement emoticon]

binkleandflip · 12/03/2008 11:37

My dd is getting married to a boy in her class (they're both 5) she thought he might have gone off her whilst we were away on hols but apparently it is still on bless 'em!

Anna8888 · 12/03/2008 11:40

LOL.

My DD (3.4) told me on the way back from school yesterday lunchtime that "Davide wanted to hold my hand at school but I said no".

However, today she told me she had let him...

They start young

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