A 3yo and a 9yo left home alone?????........opinions please!

[ammylovesolivia]

I am no longer with DDs father. She is 3 and her sister (different mum) is 9.

They both stayed together at their dads last night. I have a fairly good relationship with him- not best mates but at least civil and able to talk to him.

However, DD has just informed me that her and her sister were left alone in his house last night while he 'popped' to the shop.

I don't know how long for or where the shop was but feel a bit sick to my stomach when I think of my daughter left in the care of a 9 year old ( all be it an extremely mature and intelligent 9 year old).

But then I only have my daughter and get told all the time that I am over protective and 'too soft'. What is the general opinion on children left alone??!! I dont want to create a row without getting some wise opinion first!!

Feel like a bit of a shite mum even asking because really I should be wringing his bloody neck if thats my gut instinct but really want to be sure before I kick up a fuss. Hope nobody thinks I'm a knob for even asking! x

TIA

I'm with tortoiseshell

that's men for you.
i know a man who leaves his 3 year old to "pop" to the shops, i wouldn't dream of it .. men!

Scottish thistle I think personally there is a difference between a 6 yer old and a 3 year old and for fear of sounding like my mother things were a bit different there.
I myself would be hitting the roof if this was me although I think even with me there is a grey area here, if ther is a shop just on the corner there and back in couple of minutes 3 year old in bed like someone else said then I might be more forgiving but even in the same situation with 3 year old up and running around I might think twice but nobe as angry.
What it boils down to really is how you feel about it if your insinct is telling you that this is not acceptable then that is the right reaction.
You are getting a mixed bag here and that is your answer we all have diferent perceptions of what is acceptable so your instinct is the right one for you.

Thanks everyone. Its been good to hear your views. Will be speaking to him but more to let him know I dont want it to happen again than to let rip. Have calmed down slightly but still miffed.

Adath: Perhaps you would have a different view point if I told you the 6yo was Diabetic?

I also didn't say I thought it was right but without knowing the facts one can't judge.

Some people pop over to their neighbours for 3mins leaving their sleeping child in the house, it only takes a minute for a fire to start!

A 3 and a 9 year old are to young to be left alone at home,even if it is only for a short time. there isn't an actual law but the giudelines are that no one under 13 should be left in charge of a younger child.

my mum popped out when my brother and me were very little.

When she got back, the house was on fire.

(although she claims that if she hadn't gone out, she wouldn't have come IN the front door and seen the smoke, but even so......)

Scottish thistle I was not intending to imply that you said it was right or wrong, I'll be honest knowing diabetes it does throw a whole other set of things to consider into the mix but still better IMO than a 9 and 3 year old.
I don't even go and get the wheely bin in from the corner and leave the children in the house because it would take a few minutes but mine ar younger.

i never did the bin thingy either, they would have locked me out!

DD would manage to wreak havoc in the inutes it would take me to get to the corner and bring the bin round.