At what age would you expect your child to be able to get breakfast for themselves?

[EnglishRose1320]

As usual prompted by a disagreement between myself and my OH. Just interested to see when people think this should be happening.

My two (7 and 10) get their own cereal sometimes, and my older one makes toast for himself and has been for about 2 years.

Mine age 10 & 7 can make toast or cereal for themselves, I think cereal from age 6+ and toast age 7+

10yo can also make cups of tea and use the microwave, make sandwiches etc.

Would you let the younger do so unsupervised? Ds is 5 and although keen to do it isn't that coordinated when he does it. Ds1 who is 10 I am happy to leave to get his own breakfast.

DS has got his own cereal & cold bagel since we moved to this house so 5yo. Cereal & bowls are in a cupboard he can reach, milk on a low shelf in fridge. He also clears away everything after he's finished. He's not always the tidiest I.e. We get some milk spillage but he's supposed to clean up after himself now he's 7

About 5.

Unsupervised in the sense that I would not expect to have to help constantly.

Not in the sense that I would be happy for them to get up alone and do it while I was in bed.

Yes I think that's the difference Bathtime, I'd rather be pottering around near by whilst he got on with itvwhere as oh thinks we can let the boys get up on there own. Ds1 who is 10 has only had some crackers this morning because he is lazy. Ds2 had weetabix supervised by oh, who was grumpy about getting up- I could hear him nagging about how you get the weetabix out the box without crumbs coming out as well! ( glad he doesn't watch me do it)

I didn't let them use the toaster unsupervised until they were old enough to properly understand how to do so safely (how to plug in if it was unplugged, not to stick knives in etc!). Probably about 7-ish, as my DD is just starting to be able to do it herself sometimes, although not completely unsupervised.

Cereal? Fine. They could both do that themselves from about 6-ish.

DD is 8. Can make cereal, toast, beans on toast with snap pots.

DS is 5. Can make cereal, toast but can't open the milk or spread the butter! But very adept at Pop tarts!
And wouldn't bother diluting the squash when alone.

Both can then put their plates and bowls in the dishwasher.

I am a single parent. It is exhausting so they have been taught to do this since their father left.

Go on. Toughen them up!!!

My 4yr is very independent with food. She can help herself to things like cereal, oatcakes with marg and marmite or jam spread on ( I don't do up the jars too tightly so she can undo them)
Fruit from fruitbowl, rinse strawberries or grapes to eat etc.
She always asks before she gets something though. Never anything hot.

DS 5 years gets up and helps himself to hot cross buns. But he likes them cold and is an early risers, he's been doing it since he was 4 as well and figured out how to climb to the cupboard. I now leave them out for him to save any accidents. DD could as she's older but as she sleeps in trends to get here's made by me when I make mine.

Ds1 is 5 and can get cereal boxes down off high fridge by standing on chair next to it. He could also get milk out of fridge but I generally get it out for him. Often insists on pouring his own. But spills.

I wouldn't let him get breakfast on his own but sometimes he just does it. I try to supervise,

Depends on expectations

Ds1 is 5, he can get breakfast in a bowl ie some yogurt and granola and have some banana. He would make a mess with pouring milk though if not decanted into smaller jug

However I wouldn't expect him to be sorting his breakfast at 5. He's 5, I think it's perfectly acceptable to expect an adult to help and care for his needs like this still. Also we often do a warm breakfast like eggs or porridge which would be dangerous alone

We compromise here in that we all have breakfast together most days so it's a joint effort to prepare. Both children help lay the table, gather anything we need also, and help cook alongside Dh or I. So this morning Dh had youngest in kitchen with him whilst he made pancakes, eldest and myself laid the table together and drinks.

Mine can both do it unsupervised, the eldest doesn't because I am always up before him but dd is not allowed to wake me before 7am so if she wakes before that she will sort herself out if she is hungry.

I have a ds 3 also but he comes to my bed in the middle of the night and doesn't wake until 8ish usually.

Breakfast altogether sounds lovely but oh would never get up in time, normally I have breakfast with our ds's and they both help out. Currently both myself and oh have a flu type virus and he seems to think we should just leave the boys to cope on there own all day whilst we recover, in practice that means he has spent the last 4 days in bed whilst I have had to look after the boys, do the essential housework and nap when I can.

Well, he just sounds lazy!

We help DD (just 6). She can get the cereal and milk but we buy 4 pint bottles of milk and she can't manage that if it's full. She doesn't have toast for breakfast but we buy unsliced bread so she wouldn't do that anyway.

A good friend of mine had a DS who became severely ill/disabled as a baby. Her DS1 was only 3 at the time, and he ended up getting his own breakfast out of necessity (the parents had literally been up and down all night and DS1 used to wake up at 5am)
He was allowed a carton of juice and two yoghurts, also a hot cross bun or something from the counter that didn't need cooking or a knife. Also he was allowed to put the telly on and watch it until someone got up (usually about 7am).
It wasn't ideal, but it met everyone's basic needs.

No he's being lazy. Even if your ill you need to make sure your child has eaten and is occupied even if you take the easy option. Being a parent means you can't have the full luxury of days and days rest

Really how much effort is it even with a cold to get up, make breakfast 5 mins for a 5 year old, and set them up with some toys/ film/ colouring whilst you settle on the sofa with blanket

He is RiverTam, always had been so I should expect it really. He's not often ill as well and I had forgotten what a terrible patient he makes. It's the 4 pints of milk my ds struggles with as well.
GrumpySquash- it's amazing how even small children adapt to situations and it sounds like your friends found a very good compromise for a tricky time.
Thanks for all the feed back, pretty much confirmed my views that creating independence is great but parents still need to get parent as well.

Depends on the breakfast! Cereal, milk and toast can be prepare by some 8 yr olds.

We used to leave Muffins and cartons of juice out at the weekend but now they can make and butter toast and pour juice and get yoghurts out of the fridge.

Mine have been getting their own cereal/toast type breakfast from an early age. They all used to have breakfast together at kindergarten from age 3 where they learnt to butter bread etc and it was just natural for them to then do that at home. I think they enjoy the independence and I enjoy the lie-in. Sure they spilt milk sometimes, but they learn by doing.

As we speak, my 10 year old is downstairs cooking a fry up for us; eggs, sausage, fry potatoes, beans and toast.

5 year old makes the 10 year old gt hers!

The sooner the better IMO

Franke- I can cope with spilt milk on the table even the chairs but yesterday it was everywhere even soaking up the curtain.
It's interesting to see q mix of ages but general agreement of becoming more independent during primary school.
I think I am mainly feeling so ill that I am grumpy with oh about everything atm so I will accept that they can do more but also that he is a bit lazy.

I think a four year old could get cereal and milk out of the fridge without causing to much devastation in the kitchen. My DD was awake at a ridiculous hour so got her own breakfast from about the age of around four. Cereal only of course.

Lagoon- lucky you, my ds1 who is 10 will happily cook cakes and biscuits, nearly makes a great chicken pie all on his own but hates the idea of hobs and things that can spit. Plus is terribly lazy in general, will make toast for himself and his brother now and again, today he has refused point blank but going by the colour ofvhis skin and fact he is complaining of a headache I suspect he is coming down with what we have as well.