Gaps between babies

[Boomerwang]

I'm sure this has been done over and over again so I apologise.

When is the best time to have another child? My daughter is 10 months old and I'm 33. I want to wait, but I'm not sure what I'm waiting for. I want her to have a sibling close in age, but I'm not sure why. I don't want to be having sleepless nights in two separate periods of my life, but I don't want to have them next to each other either.

How on earth do you truly figure out when the best time is?

We have exactly three years.

Good points: DD1 was toilet trained, very easy at bedtime (story, lights out, leave the room - no sitting with her or long drawn out bedtimes), capable of getting herself a snack or a drink or taking herself to the loo, capable of playing independently, generally very easy.

Bad points: At 1 and 4, their game playing is radically different, and by the time DD2 is 2, DD1 will be at school and they'll grow further apart. So although they adore each other, the age gap does show.
DD1 had already dropped her nap by the time DD2 came along. Don't underestimate how much this matters!

And we still had a double stroller issue! DD1 hadn't used a stroller at all for at least six months before DD2 came along, but as soon as I got it out again it was all "but I am so tiiiiiirrrrrrred". At 4 and 1, I'm embarrassed to say we still have this issue regularly; I end up wearing DD2 a lot because if I use the stroller, DD1 kicks about it. So, you know.

I want a smaller age gap next time, because I'd like to keep the overall spread contained to five years; the idea of having one in daycare, one in primary and one in high school makes me shudder.

We have an 18 month gap...somedays it's really hard and some times it is absolutely wonderful and I think that is the case whatever the gap. It was important for me that my children have siblings close in age and I am old :D We began trying when my need to have a baby became more compelling than the memory of my truely dreadful pregnancy, I just woke up one day and was overwhelmed my the urge to have another baby.