Coping with 4mnth old who fusses all day long

[CADS]

Please give me some tips to cope with a fussy 4mnth dd. She seems to fuss during every waking minute. This is despite being fed, nappy changed, cuddled, played with, etc etc.

I am really battling to keep my sanity. She is so different from ds when he was a baby. It doesn't help that ds is going through the terrible twos.

She has silent reflux and is milk intolerant but is on medicine and Neocate.

I am at a loss. Her routine isn't has good as I hoped. She sleeps in her car seat at naps and nighttime because of the reflux and is difficult to feed because she seems to get tummy ache/reflux a few minutes into her feed. However, I'm starting to think her fussing is down to personality and not anything else.

Help, please help.

Maybe she's frustrated and bored. At 4mths they want to get moving & sit up but can't. Have you tried one of those treasure baskets (Franny&Zooey is the expert - there is a thread in the archives)? You could prop her up so she could play with one.

You could also try a Baby Einstein DVD/ Video. DS loved his at 4mths & it was definately worth the money.

Hopefully you'll find once she's sitting up or crawling she'll be much happier.

Is she better when you carry her around?
Maybe a sling?

DD2 was a much fussier baby than DD1, and in the end I just had to accept that, and carry on.

Now she is much livelier than DD1, and a much better eater, afet 6 months of her barely having any milk.

Keep telling yourself it's just a phase. babies change so quickly, esp no. 2.

I would have thought silent reflux and milk intolerance and being on medication is a pretty big thing to go through when you're only 4 months out of the comfort of the womb. I was wondering what makes you think its her personality and not other things?

Poor little mite, and poor you too CADS. Try a sling if being cuddled by you calms her, otherwise just keep thinking 'it's only a phase, it's only a phase'. I am sure it isn't personality and she will grow out of it.

thanks ladies.

DD hates the sling (we have tried two), also I am top heavy and get terrible back ache.

pablopatito - yes, you're right. Just don't know what else it could be and health professionals aren't very understanding or supportive. Just say "some babies are like that."

Will try to keep it together and make "it's only a phase" my motto.

Had this with dd1, always wanted to be held etc, could'nt get anything done around the house as i had to be with her 24/7, the good news is she just grew out of it, shes 2 now and plays on her own, she still likes alot hugs and fuss but does'nt make a fuss if she does'nt get any. Im sure its just a stage she is going through also i think girls seem to want more fuss than boys.

I tell you CADS, 'its only a phase' has been a lifesaver on several occassions for me.

Sounds so similar to a friends baby - she went to see a cranial osteopath in the end - miht be worth a go.

Cads - Maybe she is tired. Not very comfortable on their backs sleeping in car seat for long periods?

If the medicine is working she should not be bringing up feeds/have tummy ache and she can be put down in her cot to sleep (with the end slightly raised).

Maybe you need to seek a review of the medicine she is on?

CADS I really feel for you, you sound as fed up as I was a few weeks ago - my dd was similar from 2-4 months (now 5 months). She also had reflux, cried alot, refused to nap, got overtired, wanted carrying/entertaining all the time.

She seems alot better now and I have no real idea as is my first, but I put it down to a combination of:

• cranial osteopathy (had 5 sessions so far)
• reaching next stage of development - eg able play on front / sit up for longer etc
• me just accepting she wasnt going to have a routine and stopping trying to get her to nap and just carrying and cuddling alot, and therefore me and her relaxing
• reading 'The Fussy Baby Book' by William&Martha Sears
• going out alot so not stuck in house just coping with the fussing

So hopefully things will get better for you too.

Thanks ladies

Maybe I was to haste in putting it down to personality. Will post on the health and alleries boards and see what other mom's say about reflux med and Neocate. Unfortunately, doctors aren't too helpful or supportive because dd continues to thrive and is a big baby. I sometimes wonder if this is down to comfort eating (like her mom).

goldenoldie - I use to be on the Nov antenatal post but haven't posted in months because things have been pretty difficult since dd was born. I don't think she is tired and when she does get overtired and can't wind down, the hoover, tumble dryer, etc sends her off nicely. They have actually become my best friends in the last 4 mnths. DD is on rantitidine (1ml x 3 per day) and has recently been prescribed domperidone (3.5ml x 3), I have been told this is the maximum dosages for her weight and age so not sure where else to go. She suffers with constipation too so gaviscon it an option for us.

Thank you all for your tips, hopefully things will get better soon, just battling to see the end of the line at the moment.

Hi Cads - come back to the Nov thread. We have missed you. We are having a meet-up on the 18 April - join us. Are you Ldn based? If so, we get together quite often.

One of my DTs had really bad reflux and was started on the gaviscon (did nothing) then ranitidine and Gaviscon (did nothing), but adding domperidone really did the trick for us. He is still a difficult baby, but 100 times better than he was.

We also had 5 sessions of cranial oestopathy - can't say I noticed a difference.

Hope things improve soon for you.