I go to the bathroom to go to the loo, I look down

[beebuzzer]

.....and my phone is sat at the bottom of the toilet.

Wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry but when I came out my 12 month old looked up at me with big puppy eyes then hung her head.

She is a little miss so and so, goes round the house opening drawers, emptying them,causing her usual mahem but I didn't expect this!

What naughty things has your little one done when they were toddlers. Thought there might be some interesting stroies to share!

I found a small book floating in the toilet. Assumed it was baby and thought no more of it but remembered to always close the lid after that.
Noticed toilet wasn't flushing very well though.
Then a few weeks later ds1, aged 3, remarked randomly, 'Mum, if you want to brush your hair with the red hairbrush, you'll have to dig up the road.'
'DID YOU PUT THE HAIRBRUSH IN THE TOILET DS1?'
'Yes Mummy.' (proudly) 'And when I flushed it, it completely disappeared!

plumber was called and had to remove toilet from wall to get it out. It was wedged in the pipe, covered in poo. 2 hours work, he charged £70.

lol! when mine were little (13/11 now) we had friends around. kids went upstairs and after a while we realised they had been very quiet.
They were in the bathroom and had forced a bottle of handwash (which was sort of dome shaped) down the toilet and whenever it was flushed it flooded.
Called in a plumber who used his rods to force the bottle down the waste pipe and who cracked my bathroom sink in the process. But seemed to unblock the toilet.
A couple of weeks later, I was in the kitchen and realised that the side gulley was wet even though it had not been raining - yes, raw sewage floating all over the place - bloody plumber had managed to push the bottle down the waste pipe where it had blocked further down...
I don't even want to remember what it all cost at the time to put right.
My friend, waltzed off without a backward glance!

dd1 got hold of some scissors and cut off her hair when she was 3 (she is 8 now). Just one side, mind.

She was bald until 2 so I had only just got it to a nice length [sob]. It took ages to grow it back.

Our DS rammed 2 CDs and a debenhams gift card into the car cd player during our summer holiday. Managed to extricate the gift card, but the CDs are still stuck!

My DD put her very first pair of expensive shoes down the toilet. Ruined! It was the day I bought them too!

i found a sandwich in a video player once

We went to stay with my aunt and uncle who we don't know that well. They'd put both boys in single beds with a table in between and one of those lamps you touch the base to turn on.

Whilst we were having dinner the smoke alarms went off and my uncle disappeared upstairs to find the lamp on fire. A few more minutes and the beds would have gone up as well.

Ds2 confessed, bravely I thought, to playing with the lamp and had put his jacket over the top.

He said on the way home that at least it got us all out of eating the horrible food!

i have 5 dc and dont have ANY tales to tell!!

Is that because all the cases are currently pending and you can't discuss them?

Last weekend we realised our girls [2 and 4) had been quiet in the playroom for ages.

Went in and they weren't there. We searched all over, getting mildly hysterical.

Eventually heard whispering from our bathroom, and found two proudly smiling little girls made up to look like cats with red nail varnish.

Was such a careful job and they were so proud! Dread to think if they'd put it in their eyes.

No ill effects by the way.

DS is 2 and is currently obsessed with the hoover. I enjoyed this for a while and let him wander around the room sucking up cheerios etc which he has spilled with the hose. Then I left the room for 5 minutes. Came back to find him excitedly feeding his crayons into the hose one by one and looking very pleased with himself as they zoomed up the pipe.

Anyway I removed them and put them up out of his reach and all was well for a while, until I was doing some hoovering a few days later and couldn't understand why it wasn't picking anything up. Took the cylinder thing out to empty it and found a fork wedged right inside the pipe, past a bend that NO amount of jiggling would make it fit back through We had to take the entire hoover apart from below to get it out! I still have no idea how he managed it.

Many years ago Dd1[now 22] put toast in the washing machine, it was wholemeal bread and left tiny bits over everything.

Dd2[now 15] fed the floppy disc drive with plastic coins, we took it out to change it because it no longer worked [obviously], DP shook it and out came about 20 plastic coins .

When DD1 was 3, she thought Vicks VapoRub would make a good cleaning agent for windows (obviously I don't clean the windows often enough).
I'm a bad parent, I laughed.
Took ages to get off, though.

When I was 2, I thought it was a really good idea to grab my mum's red nail varnish and paint my 6 month old brothers face with it

My 3 yr old and 1 yr old looking sheepish in the front room. I notice the hamster cage is open. 'Wheres Snowy littlemonkey?'
'In there mummy', pointing to daddys surround sound subwoofer.

They had posted the poor dwarf hamster into the sound box, and it was running around inside. We had to turn the lights off, and leave a little trail of hamster chocs to tempt her out!

6 weeks after my son was born my daughter, then 3 and a half, painted the study, landing, stair and hall carpet with her handprints in black poster paint and then woke me at 5am to proudly show me her "art"!
The insurance company sent a carpet "shampooer" round to sort it out who burst out laughing when he saw it and promptly left!
The good news is our worn out and nasty dusky pink carpeting was all replaced with lovely pale beige, on the insurance I hasten to add!

I have endless stories of my three DCs! DS3 is particularly obsessed with shoving things down the toilet and is also good at taking things out of the toilet. Not good when DS2 forgets to flush.....!
DS1 - fell down the toilet himself while climbing on it, put a toy soldier into a gasfire (it stank my parents house out for ages!) Duplo in the Video recorder. Dummy into glasses of wine (imagine a nice chilled pinot grigio with a slobbery dummy floating in it!)
DS2 - Crayon in the toaster, pint of milk in the washing machine, wprked his way through a box of liqueur chocolates, carefully biting off the top, drinking the liqueur and leaving the bottom!
DS3 - Mobile phone in the washing machine drawer, TV remote control in the oven, happily empties a packet on baby wipes, sucking on each one!

I could go on for ever.... am i a terrible parent?

Apart from the usual stuff down toilets, the worst thing our DD did was throw my brand new glasses in the bin. They were very expensive and very lovely. She had just grasped the concept of rubbish and adored the kitchen bin. I had to wear sunglasses for a day until my new (less lovely) ones were made.

This thread is hilarious!
My LO is only 4 weeks old so don't have any stories yet but when I was a baby I managed to remove some of the bars in my cot and escape! My mum said she woke up in the middle of the night to find me sitting on the landing!

When I was about 5 I told everyone at school that my mum was pregnant (she wasn't). That was interesting for her when she came to pick me up!

DS put my mum's Lulu Guiness Make-up bag and all its contents down the toilet.
She deserved an award for how well she dealt with it!
When I was little, mum left me and little bro in the car while she went to get dad and bro took off the handbrake. I screamed as we rolled down the carpark fortunately avoiding all obstacles.
Not so calm that time were you mum :)

When I was little I stole a packet of wallpaper paste, luckily my parents were decorating at the time, and I used my mums mascara to style my eyebrows. Oh, and me and my brother thought it was fun to melt wax crayons onto the radiators, it was!

Ds had a brand new shirt on given as a Christmas present when he was 2yo. Mum had left a pair of dress making scissors lying around and Ds cut the shirt, right in the middle of his tummy; I don't know how he didn't cut himself.

I had a new dress hanging in the bathroom when Ds was 4yo. He found my nail scissors and...snip! a lovely cut in the front side of the dress that I was considering returning to the shop

Ds was growing his hair a bit...then he came upstairs with what looked like gelled down hair...then I noticed it didn't look right... He'd cut it at the front straight across and quite close to his hairline!!!

His age at this time? a week away from his 11th birthday and 5 weeks away from starting secondary school!

Bit of a theme going on here with scssors!

My little sister about 4 asked my mum if she could do her hair, was happily brushing away when my mum realised she had started chopping! Little sister had decided to give her a trim while at it.... My twin cousins were pure wild once decided to play a trick on everyone and go hiding... Police and neighbourhood search later they were both found asleep in two apple barrels! I kid you not! Same pair experimenting with MATCHES set their bunk beds on fire! Their mum decided not to have anymore dc's after them i wonder why?! Both my little sister and older brother had a real thing for opening peoples laces and there was many a funny incident where they had been quietly sitting on the floor next to an unsuspecting guest only for said guest to get up to leave later and fall splat on their face from shoes being tied together or to the leg of the chair! Older brother did that to the parish priest who was round to discuss my christening at the time needless to say he was less then happy... But my mum thought dedicating half the mass on Sunday giving out about it twas a bit much! Lol funny now though I licked the cigarette lighter in the car when about 5 was pretending it was my lipstick then decided to see how hot it got but obv didn't want to burn my wee fingers... My little sister also took the scissors to the sitting room curtains then after being given out to preceded to pack up her hello kitty bag and "run away from home" luckily my db met her at the cross roads and brought her home! We did loads of mad stuff when little and my boys are def on the same tracks. Just this mornin id to re wash most of a huge load as ds1 had used the washing machine instead of the bin to throw away his used tissues grr... And the list of coins in key holes, crayons stuck in heaters, masterpieces on places other then paper and things down the loo are endless (they are only little for a little while right?! )