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Original poster

My best friend just got engaged, and I am jealous

27 replies

moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:39

She's in this whirlwind romance type thing. I've never met him, but he sounds nice, and she deserves someone nice. The thing is though, I feel so bloody jealous. DP is still married to his evil ex wife, and altough I have dropped hints, I havent got anywhere. I had never met anyone I have wanted to marry and have kids with before I met DP. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. I WANT A RING TOO!!!!!!!! And, before you say anything, I don't want to marry him for all the wrong reasons. I'd have our wedding at the local council tip if it meant I was marrying him [two fingers down the back of the throat emoticon]

I AM JEALOUS

OP posts:
Distel · 04/08/2005 13:42

I'm sure the evil ex wife will be out of the picture soon honey. At the end of the day, you know he loves you even if he is a bit slow in showing it sometimes.

Distel · 04/08/2005 13:42

Not much concilation though really is it. SORRY.

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:45

I know, I am just jealous!!!!!

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NomDePlume · 04/08/2005 13:45

Is DP in the process of getting divorced ? It can take yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaars (trust me, I waited too), but at the end of the day your DP is with you, not her or anyone else. He loves you and is committed to you regardless of the band of gold. Keep your chin up, it will come

Distel · 04/08/2005 13:47

i KNOW ALL ABOUT JELOUSY.

I was convinced dh was in love with his ex-wife for the 1st 18 months we were together. That doesn't make for a healthy relationship

Toothache · 04/08/2005 13:47

MB - How about dropping more than hints!! Just tell him how you feel? Men are USELESS at picking up on hints.

Distel · 04/08/2005 13:48

Ask him to marry you.

nailpolish · 04/08/2005 13:48

WHY DONT YOU ASK HIM? make it clear, cos men are stupid, ie "will you marry me, id like to be your wife"

he can be engaged to you even if he is married to someone else still

the grass is always greener, i bet there are things about you that your friend is jealous of. why dont you talk to her and tell her how you feel? she will reassure you that you are great

lots of luck xxx

Toothache · 04/08/2005 13:48

I was just about to say that Distel!

You can still get engaged whilst his divorce goes through.

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:49

I used to think DP was in love with his ex, as he used to spend ages going on about her. He isnt in the process of getting divorced, as he has to wait another year to do it without her consent as he has been seperated from her for 4 years, and when he tried to get her consent 2 years ago, she basically told him to fuck off. I know its irrational, but I just can't help it!!!!

OP posts:
Toothache · 04/08/2005 13:49

Thats settled then Moozoboozo..... get some Boozo down you tonight.... and ASK HIM!

Toothache · 04/08/2005 13:50

That's only a year away though..... and it takes time to plan a wedding.

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:51

I know we could, but he thinks it wouldnt be fair on me if we got engaged while he was till married to evil bitch face. I told him I dont care, but he's got "principles"

Principles Shminciples

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nailpolish · 04/08/2005 13:51

i think its good he used to go on about her to you, he obviously trusts you and feels you trust him. better he gets everything off his chest than bottles it up. he obviously thinks you are a good listener.

a year is only a short while, go on, ask him

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:53

I don't have any principles myself, which is why we got together in the first place. I got pissed, no strike that, blind paraletic, and jumped on him Sooooo not like me. Distel will tell you, I'm a shy and retiring type

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Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:54

I know that now NP.

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nailpolish · 04/08/2005 13:56

well excuse me i was only trying to help

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 13:58

I wasnt being pissy!!!! Promise. Please come back Nailpolish. I know that becuse he told me. But when we firt got together, I thought he wasnt over the evil horrid cow.

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liandme · 04/08/2005 14:08

had same problem with my dp, he asked me to marry him when we had been together for 2 weeks and never mentioned it again, his xw is a total bitch but by friday he will be divorced from her.
we decided we should get married and to be honest with my brother and sister getting married this year i was totally jealous.
we decided to get married on first sunday in may and by the thursday i had my dress and most of the wedding sorted but i only got my ring 2 weeks ago because he said he needed to do it right which ment waiting til he was divorced but his xw messed up on the papers and it was all put on hold, i thought he would never ask but he did and it was worth the wait, we get married in just over two months and i really cant wait.
be patient it will be worth the wait

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 14:09

I know it will bve worth the wait, but I am just so bloody impatient!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:
liandme · 04/08/2005 14:13

i was too i even proposed in an email twice, told my sister to tell him how i wanted to be asked, left pics around of the ring i wanted the lot but i think that he just needed to want to do it with out being told

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 14:14

I suppose I should just take heart in the fact that he has a child with me, and not with her.

Ha!

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liandme · 04/08/2005 14:16

my dp never had kids with his xw but took on her dd and she rubs it in my face that she will always be there cos of her dd and that we dont have any kids of our own, but she soon shit herself when she thought i was preg cos her dd said i had been sick alot when she came to stay.
maybe he will surprise you and propose

HappyDaddy · 04/08/2005 15:52

why does he need her consent for a divorce?

Original poster
moozoboozo · 04/08/2005 17:21

Because there is no grounds really, apart from the fact she is an unbalanced freaky evil old witch (I'm nice really!!!) DP was going to divorce her on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour, butr, quite understandably doesnt want a long drawn out divorce. The law states that you can divorce after 2 years with no grounds providing both parties agree, and after 5 years seperation, you can do it without one paries consent

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