i want to learn to drive but i am terrified!

[cheeryface]

actually i just feel like i won't be able to do it, but my mum and brother are insisting i can and should etc

shocked to find that even a provisional costs 50 quid!

i need to do something with my life. what advice or words of wisdom can u offer ?

how do i find a good instructor?

go for a lady intructor... have a google and see if there are lessons for the terrified!

If you live in Manchester then your only choice is my husband
Phone around using your thompson local or yellow pages and ask:
Are they fully qualified driving instructors (not PDIs)
Have they passed the hazard perception test
What is their pass rate
Do they do discounts for block bookings

Also - aks some of your freinds or neighbours for recommendation. A lot of DH's business comes via word of mouth

practise inbetween lessons

Course you can do it!

It will be a challenge, but millions of people do it and pass. Try to remember that instructors have had to go through lots of training - how to drive, how to teach etc - so they really do know what they are doing..

And the feeling when you pass - it's a brilliant mixture of relief and joy. I remember looking out of the window at my new car after I'd passed and just thinking "I can go anywhere now"

As for finding an instructor - I think word of mouth works best - ask the people you know who can drive what their instructors were like.

I was just the same 5 years ago.
I put it off my entire life, always finding an excuse. Ie. The provisional costs £50, therefor I won't do it. Sound farmiliar?
I did it at 30 years old, passed 1st time and have never looked back.
Stop making excuses and learn to drive. Do you really want to have regrets when you are older?

I have the provisional, just daren't get behind the wheel.

Mind you, twice I have been taken out by someone, once my XP's sis, the second timed DP. Both times I crashed the car.

Make sure you get proper lessons first not just getting into the car with someone who thinks they can teach you.

I agree.
Your mates/ partner/ neighbour might be great drivers but there is no substituting official lessons. For a start, the instructors car has dual-controls so crashes are less likely.

DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT

If I can do it, so can you!
Don't give up either and whatever you do - relax! Don't put the pressure on. Find a time in your life when you have the time to focus on it. I did mine whilst pg with ds and ended up doing a test at 8 months pg and failing because I was so stressed about passing before baby arrived - so pick a time that is right.
I never thought I would drive, but here I am driving all sizes of cars, little ones and big 2 litre turbo cars! Go for it!

Definitely get a proper instructor in a dual-control car. And explain to them that you are nervous - they'll take you somewhere quiet to start with anyway, with no traffic to cope with, so you can get used to being in control of the car before you have to deal with anything really scary.

Once you have got the hang of the car, you can practise in between lessons with your mum or brother or whoever.

I was terrified.
Actually still am.

It's not always the case that female instructors are nicer. I'm on my third. First was a woman and was SHOUTY, she'd make me chant 'only a fool breaks the two second rule' as we drove along. I hated it.

Second was a hand holder and thy toucher.

Third is good. He calls me a numpty quite a lot, but he's calm and reasonable and a good teacher.

I'd say it was a good idea to have a trial lesson to see if you think the instructor will suit you.

I was terrified, so much so that at first I used to sweat with fear when behind the wheel.

Go for a proper instructor, be honest about the level of your fear, remember that duel controls are a wonderful invention and you will be fine! Of all the things I have achieved in life, passing my driving test still is my proudest moment.

iklboo, i am in manchester. near Rochdale

Do it do it do it.

I was like you. Terrified. I passed aged 30 on my 5th atempt. Changed my life.

i 32 now and sick of relying on people. i want to achieve something, have done nothing but look after kids since the age of 19! i have really lost confidence in all areas though. i am quite anxious at the best of times .
i am hoping i wouldn't bottle out after spending 50 quid on the provisional!

With your mum and brother behind you, you can do it. I was the same as you, for years I lived in London and put if off and put it off. I had lessons, but because I had no car to practise on I got nowhere and wasted loads of money.

FINALLY now, with my Mum and brother both taking me out to practise regularly evenings when kids are in bed, I feel like I could pass the test. Well, maybe not first time, but I could. It's not impossible.

AND I'm not scared to drive anymore, I can even have a conversation and drive now. ONCE I couldn't even have done that.

DO iT

I passed in October age 46, so it's never too late and my senile brain didn't hold me back (too much!).

I found my instructor by word of mouth. He was great fun, we had a laugh during lessons and he really put me at ease. Remember most instructors will offer a free (or reduced cost) trial lesson - might be worth doing that to find out if you're compatible before committing to a block of lessons.

Get in as much practice as you can between lessons. I was VERY lucky - the instructor turned up for my first lesson in the exact same care we had, so it made my practice so much easier.

If you're VERY nervous, you could try learning in an automatic because there's so much less to think about. I learned in an auto because of health issues and the need to get through my test as quickly as possible, and it was dead easy.

But don't put it off any longer - get that provisional ordered this week then you've GOT to do it!

Good luck!

DO IT!

I put off learning until I was 25. Even then I didn't really want to learn but decided that it was stupid not to have at least tried. I figured if I hated it that much I could always stop.

It took me 18 months and 7 tests to get my licence and I am so glad I did it. It has opened up the world to me. I love hiking in the country and before I learned to drive could never get out there and do it. Although I don't use the car at all during the week (walk to work, shops etc), at the weekends I am always out and about and I really feel it has helped me make the most of my free time and given me so much independence.

I would say: don't give up. even if you struggle (as I did). If you give up after haviing paid for all those lessons it will be in vain. At least get a licence to show for it at the end.

Oh and a female instructor is not necessarily better. My first was female and really horrible and critical. I swapped to a new one because I didn't feel I was getting anywhere with her. You're not obliged to stick with the same instructor if you don;t like them.

I passed at the beginning of last month.

The most important thing is to have a good instructor who you get on well with. If you don't 'click', you won't do as well. If you find you don't get on with the instructor - CHANGE!! Don't feel you owe them anything.

You will make mistakes, everyone does. The important thing is not to beat yourself up about it, but to learn from them.

Move to Manchester and learn with my DH - he's brilliant! [biased emoticon]