Unsure whether to accept a Samaritans volunteer role after interview

[OpenDenimCrab]

Hi everyone, I had an interview and got offered to be a listening Samaritans volunteer. I’m not sure what to do as I’ve just finished my psychology degree and am unsure whether I want to stay in psychology or use it for something else. It says online that Samaritans could be really good experience for psychology and potentially help me get an assistant psychologist job or something similar and I’m really grateful I got offered it, however I’m really unsure whether to take it or not. They said it’s a 2 year commitment, which would mean I wouldn’t be able to potentially move, do a masters, go travelling etc for 2 years from now and I’m anxious that I miss out on those opportunities for something which I may end up not using if I then don’t stay in psychology. I know that you can also deal with a lot of abusive and sexual calls, as well as people actively suicidal or even committing on the phone and I do really want to help but I feel like that would really mentally affect me and I remember when I came out of the interview I felt a bit emotional and overwhelmed afterwards thinking about the whole thing. Practically as well I’m not sure if I could even do the night shifts as they said it can finish at 3am, and the first train is at 5am and there’s also no parking so I couldn’t drive there. Also, they said that because you often cannot just end the call, a shift that is supposed to end at 10pm could go on until 12am, but my last train home is 11pm, so I would then have to wait until the 5am train. They said there is a camping bed onsite but as a young female I’m not sure id feel comfortable sleeping there. I really don’t want to come across as too negative, as I am really considering doing it as I want to help people and also gain something meaningful for my CV, but I’m also unsure whether it’s right emotionally and the length of expected commitment time. Sorry if this is a bit long, if anyone has done volunteering with the Samaritans I’d really appreciate hearing their experience and what advice they would give about it. :)

I've done it and from what you've said it's definitely not for you. There is great support and you can talk about the calls you've had that shift but some can be quite heavy going and upsetting. And there are ALOT of sex calls sadly.

I did it as I’d had experienced a number of people who had committed suicide and I wanted to make a difference. Well in the year I worked there I don’t think I dealt with one genuine call. They were mainly sexual or just oddballs. I had one call I thought was genuine active suicidal overdose then it became apparent that it was a prank.sometimes there would be wine shifts with Solon calls whatsoever. It was eye opening but it wasn’t what I was expecting so I left.

They sound very rigid. When I was a Sam’s volunteer they weren’t that rigid. They would certainly make sure you were able to get your last train at 11pm if your shift was due to end at 10pm. Saying you’d have to stay on a camp bed overnight because you’ve missed your train is fine for emergencies but hardly encouraging for a new volunteer.

Saying that, the reason I stopped volunteering was the mandatory commitment for 2 night shifts per month (although I think they later relaxed this) and the shift timings. I worked in an investment bank then and my hours meant that I could never make it to Sams in time for the start of the evening shift and if I was put on the second half night shift, I would be late for work in the morning (not possible, I would be fired!). I am still good friends with someone I met on my volunteer training and he stayed with Sams for a long time and told me that they had relaxed some of their shift/commitment rules as they realised it was losing them volunteers. But it seems like your branch is still as rigid as ever?

I don’t understand why you wouldn’t be able to do a masters, potentially move,etc. You’re not signing your life away! You’re a volunteer, not a hostage.

I think you need to decide if you really want to volunteer (you don’t sound convinced?) and if you do, have a serious discussion with them re logistics and flexibility.

As for sex calls, it used to be that 1 in every 4 calls was a sex call. No idea if that’s still the case but back then it was cheaper to call Sams for your sex fix than call a 0898 number. Although part of me always thought that if you’re calling Sams to discuss your sexual fantasy, you genuinely do need help. 😂

There is a lot of support offered so I wouldn’t worry about sex calls or abuse or any of that. But you need to decide if you want to be a volunteer as it sounds like you’re using it as a step into psychology rather than having a desire to support/help people? Are you sure you really have the right motivation to do this?

You've applied for a job listening to people who are suicidal and now think that might be too much for you? Jesus, what did you think it was?

How old are you OP?

Forgive me, but you come across as very young and I wonder if a bit of life experience and maturing might be helpful.

Why not leave it until after your Master's and another couple of years? It will still be there.

I looked into this but its honestly not practical unless you have a lot of time to give

If you're doing it as a stepping stone into a paid psychology career then I don't think that's the right reasons.
There are less distressing ways of doing that. Where you're not listening to hundreds of suicidal people a week.

It has nothing to do with your psychology qualification. You are not there to give advice. The training is great and you will help people. However you must think carefully and commit to what is a important and unique opportunity

Sounds like it’s not suitable for you at this point in time. Look elsewhere. It doesn’t sound like it fits logistically and honestly it doesn’t sound like you’re emotionally robust enough, settled enough on your next 2 years to commit, mature enough to offer real comfort or even actually want to do it for anything except to advance your career.

It’s not suited to you. So don’t do it.

Hi I am 21. I’m not 100% sure I’m doing a masters or not yet, but I do think that maybe reconsidering in a few years might be best.

This doesn't sound like the right thing for you at all right now and that's fine, I expect that's why they are so clear at the interview so that people really think about whether it's right for them

Op you’ve listed so many reasons not to do it that I think it’s not for you. Of course you may have to stay on but that stands to reason if you’re knee deep in someone’s problem. Of course if you accept a job you can’t go travelling, you’d be able to do a masters but there’d be a lot of juggling. You’re going psychology so I’d assume all the people you listed are people you expected to work with, the thing is you’re helping people, even saving some. And the parking- you find the nearest place to park when you suss it out.

Your gut sounds like you don’t want to do it, don’t take it if you don’t want to x

I looked into this too. It was the mandatory night shifts that stopped me taking it further than my initial interview. How many people can commit to that?! Also, it's not safe for a woman to be walking through the city in the dead of night after a shift. I ended up volunteering for HomeStart instead. Much more suitable for me, and zero pervert sex callers to deal with!

I am a Samaritan and have worked at 2 branches and I do not recognise the restrictions put on you - it is a volunteer role so how can they force you to stay for 2 years? They ideally want that commitment upfront as there is so much investment from them on the training and so don't want to take on people with plans in the short to medium term to move on

you can end calls when your shift ends - you give the caller a bit of notice to prepare them and inform them they can call again to continue conversation - indeed most of us stop taking calls for the last 20-30 minutes of the shift to ensure we are finishing on time .. some offices are so small that the next set of volunteers need your seat so this is perfectly fine

as for night shifts - most branches will pay for taxis if public transport not available or if they don't, you can get exemptions to nights if it too difficult to get in

as for the calls - yes there are sex calls but my experience is about 5% of all I take and I close them down quickly and brutally and feel OK to do that. Most calls are from lonely people or ones who dont want to talk to friends or family about things - very few are from actively suicidal but the training to manage them is excellent..

sounds like you are unsure about it - it is not for everyone so if it does not feel right for you now, dont do it .. and maybe reconsider in a few years?

There are all sorts of other opportunities to help vulnerable people on a voluntary basis that are less demanding and rigid than this. Look into volunteering in prisons, police custody units or care homes .

I'm shocked that people are saying you get sex calls. I did this as a young woman in my early 20s back in 1983/4 and never experienced this at all. How times have changed (for the worse). I don't think I would volunteer nowadays. Awful.

I’m a Childline counsellor and have been doing it for nearly a year. The commitment is that you do at least 26 shifts a year and the shifts are only 4.25 hours long and 0.75 is a beginning chat and a debrief at the end. You do have to go into an office as we are supported by senior practitioners for safeguarding reasons. I’ve not had a career with children, just a mum, but I’ve found it incredibly rewarding and the other volunteers and staff are a truly lovely group of people. Interestingly there were a lot of Psychology students on my training course which was 3 months for a few hours each week plus 2 shifts where you are monitored before you are let loose on real children and young people.

In that case OP, I'd honestly leave it for ten years or so. One of the things you mentioned - that a pp picked up on a well - is that it's a bit ruthless to do it just to advance your career.

Pure altruism is a rare beast indeed, but some element of serving society is necessary in this context.

Best of luck with your decision.

A two-year commitment? I’ve never heard that - we’re certainly not told that at my branch. How can they make you stay if you don’t think it’s for you?

You do know that Sams is known as the suicide charity, and you will probably have calls from suicidal people. I say probably; you may not. Most calls are not from suicidal folk.

Yes, there are sex calls and other contact that Sans does not tolerate, but when you have a few good calls on a shift, it makes it all worthwhile.

You shouldn’t have to take on a night shift if you have no way of getting home afterwards. That’s not safe and your branch leadership team should not be suggesting you do that. They want volunteers to stay as long as possible so want to make it easier for them to turn up and do shifts.

They do want people to cover nights and early mornings, but only if they can.

After a shift you offload to another Sam, and the other listeners are fantastic support during a shift.

You sometimes have to stay after your shift ends, if you are on the call to an active suicide, But this is rare.

i wonder if you might be too young/not at the right time for this? Most Sams volunteers are older with more life experience - you might want to apply again in a few years.

A friend of mine does it and it is a big commitment for many years. I’m sure my friend does it from home though. So I’m not sure why you have to physically be there for your shift, after the training process has been completed.
The training is supposedly quite good, I’ve heard it’s thorough.
It doesn’t sound like something you should do now. Come back to it later in life when you have more time. I also think there’s a benefit to being an older listener with a lifetime (or half a lifetime) of experience behind you. Focus on your travelling, paid work, your masters, other things you’d enjoy for now while you have the freedom to do it.

Sams is trialling working from home, but it is just a trial, and most volunteers are dead against it.

i don’t want the kind of calls I often get in my home - that’s my safe place. And where are my fellow shift members if I have a bad call? You need the support of the other Sams you work with.

Even childline gets sex calls from adult men. It's disgusting.

Agree with previous posters. It is something that you can return to in future years after fulfilling other life goals, gaining more life and interpersonal experiences etc, but it sounds as though you're on the fence about it - that's not a positive start to a highly demanding role such as Samaritans.
I had a similar quandary when I interviewed and was offered the role of a 999 emergency contact handler last year. Fantastic team, important work, made it through the interview - but had an underlying feeling that I simply wouldn't be able to manage the role long-term, considering the highly fast pace, emotional pressure and erratic shift patterns.
I'm in my 30s and have a background in Sociology and Criminology, but nonetheless decided that 1) I wasn't robust enough for the role, and 2) my educational background was kind of irrelevant for such a vital role - and couldn't and shouldn't be treated as a career accessory!

But congrats on being offered the role :) that's a huge achievement. You'll be a fantastic candidate for other roles that suit you in life right now.

I’m not sure the volunteering at prisons or custody units would be less stressful than Sams!

Can you even volunteer in those places??

I did it fur a couple years. Whilst it’s good experience I’m not sure it would tip the edge for an assistant psych role as they pretty much take anyone regardless of experience.
Majority of calls are hang ups , after that it’s people making stuff up and sex calls. You get disgusting stuff around children and they try to say it’s making them suicidal until the heavy breathing starts.
I had one possible suicide (in 2 years) as in mid committing suicide and didn’t want to be alone but also didn’t want help and stopped talking (so either passed out or died) . I say possible because again people fake stuff.
There were some regular lonely people who just rang for a chat (this was 10 years ago so mostly phones and they tended to route to local line)
And some depressed suicidal people rang but these were the least common.
Obviously you don’t have to do 2 years they ask for the commitment because the charity invests time/money in you and wants value for money. And you can give availability (although at the branch I volunteered at there was an expectation of a night shift amonth) but it is a big commitment that can be emotionally draining and obviously it’s unpaid. I’d only do it because you want to.
if you want to enhance your cv I’d look more at women’s centres/refuges/ aid. Or mental health charities.