On the run from the Style Police

[JingleBellJodee]

Wanted ... for living in a house with uPVC windows, an artificial Christmas tree, central heating and (gasp!) net curtains...!

Reward ... a set of Christmas garden gnomes and free pebble-dashing for your Victorian semi.

What if you've already had stone cladding (a la The Duckworths)

Just don't buy one of those doors with a built-in "Georgian" fanlight, OK?

hmm...

artificial xmas tree = being environmentally aware

net curtains = voiles, darling, voiles

need a light up santa & reindeers for the roof too?

Oh, and round here, it's also a crime to not take your blue recycling bin off the street within nano-seconds of it being emptied.

On the plus side, I've never heard anyone criticised for house/car alarms that go off at the drop of a hat when I'm trying to get my children to sleep. (Grrrr)

I have UPVC and nets too And its an edwardian terrace