What can I get my friend for her 40th birthday? She says she's not going to celebrate it

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And I think she's secretly a bit, I don't know, worried about it. She says she's not doing anything but I emailed her dh who is taking her away for the weekend. Another friend and I are probably going to turn up and take her out for dinner during the week of her birthday but what can I/we get her? I'd like to get something thoughtful.

She's a sahm, has plenty of cash so could buy herself anything if she wanted it but she tends to be quite frugal. She's Mrs Organic, doesn't read much, doesn't have time for many interests.

Ideas welcome. TIA.

Buy her some nice Italian leather

what about some amazing organic toiletries like those made by Jo Wood (organics) or Jo Malone - something v v v v indulgent - or Chanel No 5 (can't go wrong with a bit of chanel IMHO)

I wanted a nude oil painting of me done on my 40th, but my ex husband didn't agree.

If she's frugal then why don't you buy her something extravagant?

or

Take her 40 chocolate muffins with a candle in each one!

find out what the top 10 was on her birthday and make a CD of the songs.

It is somethign that she couldn't just go and buy, would be quite cheap but shows you have put some effort into it.

You could place it inside a beautifull box of organic chocolates

how much are you spending? Does she like facials or massages or such like?

(btw Xenia, a friend of ours' dh bought her a session at a photo studio for errr sexy photos (not nude, tastefully sexy iyswim) for her birthday. I think I'd hate that sort of present but she absolutely loved it!)

Xenia get them done for him on your annversary.

fox, yes, you have to do your due diligence with presents like that with care or it back fires.
pp, we got divorced after I turned 40 so he's missed his chance.

I'd back the posho facial/day out at spa one. Although obviously she'd have to have her dh or someone doing the childcare...

Spiezia does nice organic toiletries, v posh indeed.

Membership of the Women's Environmental Network . They do good work and might inspire a whole new lease of life.

wow, I wish I had you all as my friends when I turned 40. I didn't find it too tramautic really, went from an older thirty something to a very young forty something.

oh yea, gift ideas? Does she drink cofee/tea. My favorite thoughtful type gift is a giftcard/ gift certificate to an upsscale coffee/tea shop. It depends on if she is the type to go off by herslef and treat herself to some peace and quiet and a nice hot drink.

Thanks for all the suggestions everyone. MI, this is the woman you interviewed about nappies!

I might go for that Leo Hickman book about trying to live in an environmentally friendly way for a year plus some pampering thing.

I will also make a list of all over 40yo women who are amazing I think.

Oh God, I can't wait until I'm 50 personally, that's when you've got the freedom.